Positively Outrageous Service

How do you regulate your feelings and respond to other people's feelings? https://youtu.be/_uNQ0cGyjmU “Emotions are one of the main things that derail communication. Once people get upset at one another, rational thinking goes out of the window.” ~ Christopher Voss There isn't a business that doesn't have difficult, emotional, or even angry customers and team members. It's not easy to converse with them, but there are emotionally intelligent ways to effectively reduce both sides' frustration. Emotional intelligence (sometimes also called EI or EQ) is the ability to identify and regulate your feelings and people's feelings around you. One leadership coach describes it as: "The act of knowing, understanding, and responding to emotions, overcoming stress in the moment, and being aware of how your words and actions affect others." A higher EQ facilitates deeper relationships, whether in a team or with your customers. Use your emotional intelligence to deal with issues faster by practicing the following six strategies to more effectively work with angry, emotional, or difficult people: Use their name Exercise reflective listening Practice empathy Recognize their baggage Split it up Stay calm In this episode, we'll cover the first three. 1. Use their name. Utilizing their name recognizes your customer or teammate as a person – a person with a particular problem and history that you actively want to help. It communicates a more personal degree of authenticity. Practice interjecting their name naturally into your dialogue. Don't make it forced. Imagine you're talking to your dejected friend. 2. Reflective Listening The upset customer or teammate is sharing their concerns. People are exposed when they express their emotions. When people complain or want assistance, it's often during times when they're exasperated, perhaps enraged, certainly not in a calm place. When you show that you're listening and validate what bothers them, you draw near to soothing their pain or hurt. It's more than saying "I understand" or "I hear you" because those phrases are banal and sound like platitudes. Practice reflective listening! Wikipedia defines reflective listening as "seeking to understand a speaker's idea, then offering the idea back to the speaker, to confirm the idea has been understood correctly." For example, a customer might say to you, "I've been trying to get my payroll corrected for ten days, and I'm frustrated." Your reply exercising reflective listening: "What I hear is you're frustrated because your payroll issue is not fixed yet. Is that right?" Or your teammate says, "I needed that information last week, and I feel you've ignored me," you might reply, "So, you feel that I neglected you when you needed that report from me, is that correct?"  You're absorbing what the person shared, repeating it back to them in a way that shows you understood. The reflective listening demonstrates that you're not only paying attention, you're also deliberating about what they're sharing with you. Here's the warning label. Don't be a parrot. People pick up quickly if you're merely repeating back what you heard without processing what is being said - the result can aggravate and make the situation even worse! Effective reflective listening needs to incorporate empathy. 3. Not sympathy – empathy Sympathy is seldom the best response to an irate person's problem. Instead, empathy positions you simultaneously as professional, compassionate, and considerate. It frees you up to NOT become emotionally entangled - like when you express sympathy. Here's another way to look at the difference. When you're sympathetic, you simply feel badly for someone. Sympathy doesn't convey that you appreciate WHY they feel the way they feel. The archetypal response – "I'm sorry" – is deficient. It won't solve the customer's or teammate's problem. They expect more.

Questions Create Engagement. Engagement deepens relationships. Richer relationships boosts revenue.  https://youtu.be/O1nC3TgZJjI “How are you?” “When do you need that by?” “What’s the problem?” “What do you mean by that?” “Where did things go awry?” “Ideally, how would you like the outcome to be? “ “How else can I help you?” “Judge a man by his questions rather than by his answers.” ~ Voltaire Questions create engagement. Engagement deepens relationships. Richer relationships propagate loyalty, raving fans, and advocacy.  Intense loyalty, raving fans, and advocacy means more business from your existing customers and new business from the outside because of your positive reputation.  All too often in an organization, questions are an overlooked opportunity. Questions are an exceptionally potent means for unlocking value. Questions accelerate learning, fuel creativity, and unleash new solutions. Questions build rapport and deepen trust within your team and with customers. And it can mitigate business risk by revealing unanticipated pitfalls and hazards. For some, questioning comes easily. Natural inquisitiveness, emotional intelligence, and the knack to read people put a jewel of a question on their lips. However, most of us don’t ask enough questions or optimally position our queries. Consistency is the key. Practice, practice, practice; ask better questions, quality questions, open-ended revealing questions; what, how, when, where – and you’ll experience breakthroughs in relationships and revenue. And here’s the bonus: you’ll instinctively improve your emotional intelligence, which in turn makes us better questioners—a healthy cycle. Voltaire, the French writer, philosopher, and historian, once said: “Judge a man by his questions rather than by his answers.”  Start today, stop telling and start asking. Dig deeper. Use the power of silence and listen. And ask another question …

How's Your Heart in Serving Others with Positively Outrageous Service® https://youtu.be/lhfJh0G49Nc Here's a 2-minute touchpoint on what I find to be the heart of Positively Outrageous Service.  How does your heart see your role in serving another with Positively Outrageous Service? (POS). "The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others" ~ Mahatma Gandhi My mother-in-law, Yvonne, not the most healthiest person when walking, found herself traveling to see us In Dallas. She was coming from California, and boarding that flight, she had to go through a challenging but, as it turned out, a meaningful airport experience. I know we tell many airport stories - they're just fodder as we bump into each other, having those beautiful people interactions and experiences that are Positively Outrageous! It's not a pleasant journey for Yvonne to go from curbside, through security, and then to her gate. She requests and gets a wheelchair. The wheelchair person who pushes her to the gate starts up a conversation. He asks her about herself. He was charming, lovely, and engaging in spending those few moments with her. When he got her to the gate, he realized she had to wait a while for that plane to board. He made a critical choice. He decided to stay with Yvonne and make sure that she was able to make the plane. Not everyone would do that. A "service natural," by definition, does precisely that. Most wheelchair attendants know and do their job well, going from one place to another with one person or another. She tells this story over and over and over again. What strikes me the most is the wheelchair attendant's disposition to her. Yvonne shares how he asked questions about her; how he was genuinely interested in her; how he passed the time, which took about 45 minutes before that gate opened, and he permitted himself to leave. To invest time with another, fully present and engaging, requires a deliberate choice. That is the core of Positively Outrageous Service. To put service in front of self –  to have the heart of someone who sees, anticipates, and understands the customer's needs and takes advantage of those moments, and genuinely brings a positively outrageous experience in serving them. If your heart is in the right place, and you are sincerely doing it to authentically serve another, moments to deliver positively outrageous service pop up all the time. Where is your heart when it comes to helping others? Let me encourage you to ignite that part of your heart that says I know what I need to be for the person in front of you, and you watch what happens to your service as it becomes positively outrageous!

A Special COVID-19 Message How are you caring for your team? Favor them with Positively Outrageous Service! https://youtu.be/xnN8JQ6vIw0 "I have just three things to teach: simplicity, patience, compassion. These three are your greatest treasures." - Lao Tzu Connect deeper with your virtual teams - Check-in questions with your virtual teams: What do you think? How do you feel? Tell me more! Interact more! Set ground rules ahead of time for virtual engagement - Ensure they know their role, Be intentional about connecting visually not just through social media or a phone call. Many are, or are feeling isolated …. Connect virtually, use visually Look ways to have fun and relieve the tension. Virtual Happy Hours.  Dance video! Dress up for cocktail hour! Look at what they're doing in Italy, Portugal and Spain! Fun can be infectious and viral … in a positive way Don't just manage ... Lead! Ask better questions. Leaders ask great questions! Check out Leading With Questions! Have fun while wearing a mask …. can you smile under that mask? Be them-focused first … out of proportion to the circumstances. Not just your team but also the people we work for … don’t assume everyone’s OK! Followup up video - record your visually virtual meeting! Or followup with a video vs. and email! Go virtual - yoga studios are providing online classes. Schools switching over to online teaching. Hours … many grocery stores have special plans to dedicate the first hour of each shopping day to senior shoppers and / or their employees. BONUS: Demonstrate grace and forgiveness - relieves tension and stress — Be the first to say sorry. Be the first to forgive!

How caring in a time of crisis elevates customer loyalty. 10 Ideas to Spark Your Creativity https://youtu.be/pPCZ0eG6W0M “Giving is not just about making a donation. It is about making a difference.” ― Kathy Calvin Give, give, give - During the NBA hiatus, Mark Cuban, the owner of Dallas Mavericks, immediately announced that hourly workers at the American Airlines Arena will be continue to be paid. Turn your business upside down- Louis Vuitton Conglomerate (LVMH), the French luxury conglomerate that operates more than 75 brands, including high-end labels like Louis Vuitton, Fendi, and Celine is now making hand sanitizer in its perfume factories. It will produce up to 12 tons of hand sanitizer a week alone as the coronavirus crisis escalates in France. And they are giving it away for free. WOW!!! Meet your customers virtually or through video. Deliver content virtually – Sunstone FIT yoga studio is providing on line classes. Schools switching over to online teaching. Hours … Dollar General Corporation and others announced their plans to dedicate the first hour of each shopping day to senior shoppers. Look ways to have fun … and relieve the tension … Italians started singing from their balconies. In Spain people began applauding healthcare workers at 10m throughout the country. How about a dance video? Michael and his daughter did just that and got over 10 million views in 10 days! Fun is infectious! Empower your team to deliver beyond the circumstances. Leading versus managing - Leaders ask better questions. Grace and forgiveness are critical in this time of stress — both externally and internally. Go first! Care for your team - Love is infectious too and your customers will feel more cared for.

A Special Coronavirus Message to Our Friends from Positively Outrageous Service!!! “A bend in the road is not the end of the road… Unless you fail to make the turn.” ― Helen Keller Like many of you, Michael and I are rethinking our business strategies in this time of turmoil, turbulence and trouble. We are revamping some of programs and delivery mechanisms to preserve, protect and pivot our clients' profitability, market share and competitive edge. The Coronavirus pandemic has changed our business in that we are currently not meeting face-to-face or delivering our content live. We are making the "turn" to appropriately navigate the bend in the road. But this is also a time to not just hunker down and be defensive but to reach out to help others in need. Not all will successfully navigate the sharp bend in the road. This is an unprecedented time in our history ... however, it can spur us to a higher calling ... are you going to retreat in the face of fear or advance with a fearless strategy? "So, first of all, let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is...fear itself — nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance. In every dark hour of our national life a leadership of frankness and of vigor has met with that understanding and support of the people themselves which is essential to victory.” Franklin Delano Roosevelt,  32nd President, Inaugration Speech, March 1933. In this spirit, Michael and I recorded a special edition video and podcast for you that addresses these very times. It's a special talk where we highlight ten Positively Outrageous Service actions to potentially partake in and uplift and advance those around us in this time of turmoil! We trust it brings hope, a smile, and a ray of sunshine into the world we now must defend, rebuild or redirect. All joy, Andrew, Michael and Scott https://youtu.be/mbnDPkT_G48 Here's a summary of the ten actions to advance, (more details in the podcast or video). Support Older People and Others At-Risk Volunteer for Meals on Wheels Donate Money to a Reputable Non-Profit Support Your Local Food Bank Support Small Businesses Donate Blood Check in on Your Neighbor Support the Homeless Write a Letter! Don’t Hoard or Stockpile — Give It Away! BONUS: Stop Judging and Start Loving!  Let us know what you think! Share your Positively Outrageous Service stories with us!

Love On Your Customers - Drop a Love Bomb or Two! Creating WOW Behind the Lines! Go to war against the negativity in the world. Be a disruptor by dropping love bombs. Ignite and equip behind the lines not with “drive by feedback” but with “love bombs”. The people you work with can lose perspective because “we live behind our eyeballs.” This mission is very specific: Be precise in your observation – the “what” … not just an “attaboy” Connect it to the “why”. Love bombs are not just for your employees, but your team members too. How about the people your report to and other stakeholders!

Giving Thanks to Your Customers, Clients, Suppliers and Employees “Gratitude, not understanding, is the secret to joy and equanimity.” – Anne Lamott. Gratitude – Give thanks for who you are, what you have, and those around you. What you are feeling is more important than what you are thinking. What are you thankful for? Giving thanks builds community and connection.  Giving thanks communicates how you are important to me. Who in your business is helping you be successful? Do something fun for them! An attitude of gratitude is beneficial for the giver and not just the receiver! Gratitude boosts your hormones, from oxytocin to cortisol, as well as neurotransmitters, such as dopamine and serotonin. Recent studies point to gratitude delivering behavioral and psychological bonds. Oxytocin connects adults in meaningful relationships. Gratitude accelerates blood flow and activity in the hypothalamus, the master gland that controls hormones. Give thanks and release joy through a natural cocktail of drugs! A key 2003 study on gratitude concluded that, “a conscious focus on blessings may have emotional and personal benefits.”* Improved sleep, decreased depression, greater happiness are all driven from a habit of gratitude. Not only will you benefit others by showing your gratitude, YOU will personally benefit. The more you give gratitude .... the more you will derive from its benefits! Start today. Practice it for 30 days until it becomes your habit! Photo by Gabrielle Henderson on Unsplash "You cannot bring anything new into your life until you are grateful for what you have now.” - Dr. Michael Beckworth Want to dive deeper? We recommend this excellent article by Dr. Sara Gottfried: Thanksgiving: What Gratitude Does to Your Brain     Emmons, R., et al. “Counting blessings versus burdens: An experimental investigation of gratitude and subjective well-being in daily life.” American Psychological Association – Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 84, no 2 (2003): 377-389.

NOVELTY A Key Driver to the Positively Outrageous Service Pillar: “Random and Unexpected” The power of novelty is in “contextual” novelty. Doing something we expect in an unexpected way. We are all endowed with creativity. It takes many different forms. One may be creative in creating magic moments through listening; creativity through how we respond to a complaint; creativity in solving an employee problem. Be novel and creative! Where can I stand out today? Challenge yourself. What can I do differently today with that person in front of me in this moment? Spontaneously creative, interesting and unexpected!

TACIT APPROVAL Nip it in Bud! Championing Positively Outrageous Service is both explicit and implicit. Tacit approval is the message that is being communicated when one doesn’t speak out. The unspoken implicit sets a precedent every bit as much as explicit championing. Actions of management speak as loud as the words communicated. Tacit approval of toxic behavior creates a negative environment that undermines the ability to foster a Positively Outrageous Service culture. Listen to your employees and customers, uncover it, discover it, and address it! Photo by Drahomír Posteby-Mach on Unsplash