Please Send Dick Pics

This week's guest is Existential Engineer and Comedian, Alyssa Poteet!
 April Walterscheid and Alyssa discuss News and Celebrity Dick of the Week. They also delve into the following hot topics:

 ○ is air horn officially obsolete because our comedy mouths took over? ○ why being NOT self-conscious as a comedian could get you 75 million dollars ○ as soon as you're 100% self-conscious - YOU'RE DONE 
○ why having an engineering degree plastered on your wall feels spooky
 ○ how to disappoint your mom by doing comedy 
 ○ why society is one BIG junkie
 ○ what it’s like to have a decent soul that is ruined by greed
 ○ 15 ways to turn-on your man when all you need is ANAL ○ democratic debates getting the snapchat filter treatment
 ○ Jeffrey Epstein and how Louis CK is actually scraps for the big dogs 
○ how to accidentally turn a 2-minute joke into a 12-minute joke nightmare of anxiety
 ○ when your 3-year-old nephew hits on you and gets away with it
 ○ finding your calling card as a comedian based on the jokes you write
 ○ Kathy Griffin ○ everyday people who want to be the leader of their own divisive group that thinks exactly like they do
 ○ giving up on ALL self-help articles to find your inner voice and confidence again ○ ups and downs of manifestation ○ does this podcast description read like a cosmopolitan magazine cover? does it make you want to listen?
 ○ how the world becoming one giant improv troupe would fix everything 
○ PLUS! other things to overthink about PROUDLY Alyssa’s Twitter: www.twitter.com/potweet901
 Alyssa's Instagram: www.instagram.com/complete_poteet Shoutout to comedians KJ Samora and Ali Musa. "Oops!... I Did It Again [Instrumental]" by Max Martin and Rami Yacoub "Dear Diary [Instrumental]" by Timmy Allen and Barry J. Eastmond * * * * * * * Lyrics: Oops!... I’ve been dick pic’d again It came through my Hotmail Got lost in the spam Oo crabby crabby Oops!... you think that I love it Because it’s sent from your pants I’m not that into it * * * * * * * Dear Diary Today I saw a dick pic And I wonder if it noticed me It made me go gay-ay-ay

 Dear Diary I can't get it off my mind And it scares me Cause I've never felt this way 

No one in this world Knows me better than you do So Dick Diary 
 I'll confide in you
 Dear Diary I saw his dick in person As it swung by I thought it smiled at me And I wondered
 Does he know I’m currently HARD !?! I tried to smile, but I could hardly breathe Should I tell it how I feel Or would that make me gay? Diary, tell me what to say (Please tell me if I’m gay?) * * * * * * * Recorded in Garage Band from my own bed - thank you technology for making these parody songs possible. 🖤

This week's guest is Physician Assistant and Comedian, Michele Taylor Paden! April Walterscheid and Michele discuss News and Celebrity Dick of the Week. They also delve into the following hot topics: ○ growing up in Colorado ○ moving to San Francisco ○ seeing comedian Ali Wong before her Netflix specials ○ working in a hospital emergency room on Thanksgiving ○ being mistaken for a Mormon or cult member everyday ○ texting a guy 159,000 times ○ how women get prosecuted for things less worse than murder or rape ○ how men get away with rape ○ children overdosing on edibles ○ drugs expediting psychosis in all ages ○ generalized phobia of snakes ○ finding a snake on a canoe Michele's Instagram: www.instagram.com/michele.c.paden "Gold Skull" by Miniature Tigers