20,000 Leagues (Under Tier Three)

Wellingborough Whitworth vs Rushden and Higham United AND Wellingborough Town vs Cogenhoe United (18/01/2020)

NEW CONTENT ALERT!  (Albeit, content that was recorded back in January and that we have been too distracted to upload)

In this episode, Sean and Gus watch a football match each, both in the lovely town of Wellingborough.

Relive the excitement and freedom of the world pre-pandemic. Hear about live football again. Learn about two clubs living metres apart. Embrace stories about visits to lovely pubs.

We will all be there again.

There's also:

- Discussion about zombie apocalypse preparations
- Darts sums
- And the quiz

Please do listen and enjoy!

Contact details

Please get in touch via Twitter at: @20000leaguespod   
Or email us at: [email protected]   

FC United of Manchester vs Buxton (12/10/2019)

Where were you when we were getting high?

It's here. Audio proof of our trip up north. Complete with gravelly voices after our Big Night Out and a rejuvenated understanding of old Oasis lyrics. We sing. We talk. Gus gets angry at Sean unnecessarily because he has a headache. Etc.

We loved Manchester. And we loved FC United and its community focus. This episode talks about all of that, and also:

- Non-league Day (it was non-league day when we went)
- Whether Goldeneye was shit or not
- The absence of pottery theory in Sean's pottery evening class

PLUS! QUIZ! OF COURSE.

Also, a shout out to the wonderful Malcolms club at the match, and the great band they had on: The Stanleys (http://www.stanleysband.co.uk/)

Contact details

Please get in touch via Twitter at: @20000leaguespod   
Or email us at: [email protected]    

FC Romania vs Barking (21/9/2019)

Bine ati venit!

First, I'd like to start with an apology. During the quiz in this episode, I boast about my question writing abilities due to a 'clever' ham-related reference. Unfortunately, this was incorrect. There is no Sorrento ham. Instead, obviously, it is Serrano ham. This was an extremely foolish mistake that I would not normally make, and I presume was a punishment forced upon me by some form of deity due to my audacious boasting. I will try to learn from this setback and pick and choose my boasting more carefully in future.

(Also, apologies for how late this episode is)

Apart from that abomination (which I trust we can now leave behind us), this episode covers the joys of seeing FC Romania at Theobalds Lane (home of Cheshunt FC) - a stadium that has an absolutely beautiful concrete stand.

We also cover:

- Discussion of Romanian football
- An explanation of how PO Boxes work
- Whether it is harder to score a free kick under or over a wall
- A special edition burger

Plus jam-making tips.

Se bucura!

Contact details

Please get in touch via Twitter at: @20000leaguespod   
Or email us at: [email protected]    

Redhill vs Ascot United (17/8/2019)

On this episode we discover that Sean actually knows a lot about horses. Particularly their movement. We also discuss what happens when you shout 'Redhill!' at a football match and give some background to the football club itself. There are TWO QUIZZES (one taken at speed) and there is general chatter about:

- Difference in quality between non-league and professional football
- The amount of cows there would be in the world if everyone become vegan
- Putting crows to work making drills for retail purposes
- The Sino-Japanese war
- Our favourite teletext pages

Also, find out the punchline of the age-old joke: How many members of Chumbawamba does it take to change a lightbulb?

Contact details

Please get in touch via Twitter at: @20000leaguespod   
Or email us at: [email protected]    

Kettering Town vs AFC Telford (3/8/2019)

NEW SEASON! YOUR CHANCE TO WIN A SIGNED HAT!

First game of the new season and excitement was high at Latimer Park, where newly-promoted Kettering Town faced AFC Telford. Sean and Gus were there to soak it all in and to witness a pretty good football match, including a stunning penalty save by the Kettering keeper, Paul "Big Show" White.

This episode touches upon that, and also features:

- The essential guide to saving and scoring penalties
- An assessment of shirt sponsorship in football
- Discussion of Paul Gascoigne's time managing the club

Plus: The latest instalment of the QUIZ! With a new jingle inspired by the hit pop singer, Cher!

Contact details

Please get in touch via Twitter at: @20000leaguespod   
Or email us at: [email protected]    

Staines Town vs Gosport Borough (20/4/2019)

Aiiiiiiiii. G-Ham and S-Sizzle visit the mean streets of Staines-upon-Thames to watch football, eat pork pies with piccalilli and try on hats. Check it. This episode chats on that, and also:

- The old amateur cup competition, the Coppa Ottorino Barassi
- When is the earliest in a season a team could get relegated
- The home life of assistant referees
- Favourite darts calls

There might also have been a big argument about whether Victoria Coren Mitchell should present QI.

WARNING: The episode features an offensively bad Ali G impression. Apologies to those easily offended.

Contact details

Please get in touch via Twitter at: @20000leaguespod   
Or email us at: [email protected]    

Fleet Town vs Slimbridge (16/2/2019)

Sean and Gus visit leafy Hampshire, and come away with more questions than answers:

- Could a podcast prove the afterlife?
- Should footballers be role models?
- If Fleet is the best place to live in the UK, then how come Fleet Service Station is only the 63rd best?

Fortunately, they managed to distract themselves from these issues by visiting a fantastic (but now closed) jukebox shop (although it still operates online - see details below) and Fleet Town; a very friendly football club then struggling due to the FA's last minute decision to switch them into a more travel intensive league. This left the club going into the season without players, without management and without sponsorship.

What does all this mean? Tune in to hear more.

Contact details

Please get in touch via Twitter at: @20000leaguespod   
Or email us at: [email protected]   

Jukeboxes

Select jukeboxes (jukeboxes repaired, hired or sold): https://selectjukeboxes.co.uk/ 

Whitstable Town vs Herne Bay (8/12/2018)

Osyters, fights, pubs and a lovely man named Chris. Sean and Gus experience a wet and windy Saturday visiting Whitstable Town football club. And highly recommend it.

This episode covers all that, and also:

- Two quizzes
- Question marks over stewarding levels
- A long joke about baby balloons
- Discussion about the sad demise of Thamesmead Town FC

We also talk about the match a bit too.

Contact details

Please get in touch via Twitter at: @20000leaguespod   
Or email us at: [email protected]    

AFC Hornchurch vs Merstam (30/10/2018)

It's October 2018, and Gus and Sean start their non-league journey in Essex, by visiting the home of the Urchins, AFC Hornchurch. Gus gets over-excited by a corner flag and buys a small fridge magnet off a man living in a hut. While Sean goes to a pub on his own and starts fantasising about sponsoring a man. Other topics covered include:

- The global and localised rules for the game of tag/it
- Dmitri 'The Dream' Kharim (and other goalkeepers that wore trousers)
- Watching someone starve to death in a haunted mirror

And, of course, there was the first edition of the quiz.

Please be warned: This episode is a pilot. It even has a silly name. Use the name above when telling your friends in the pub about it. And send any communications and/or vitriol to:

TWITTER: @20000leaguespod