Rewriting Your Happily Ever After

The seventh interview in the Desi Divorce Discussion series features a friend, Dr. Priya who was also my colleague in Hyderabad. During the years we spent at our workplace, I was going through my separation phase, followed by divorce while Priya was married. Later when she went through a divorce, she reached out and I shared some of my experiences. She has read my book Rewriting My Happily Ever After – a memoir of divorce and discovery, and left a generous review on Amazon. Today, she speaks about her journey.

Through this podcast, my goal has been to showcase the various situations in which women find themselves when it comes to choosing to get a divorce despite their personal situations and limitations.

Have you ever wondered why professionally qualified, financially independent women who have been brave about their other choices hesitate to walk away from their marriage and how they finally come decide that they need to move on to a better life?

In this episode, Dr. Priya shares her story and sheds light on what makes a highly qualified and ambitious medical doctor stay in her unhappy marriage for eleven years. In Priya's case, there we no children involved, yet the decision to go for a divorce was not an easy one.  Listen to this interview to find out more.

As an only child of her doting parents, Priya continued to hold out the hope that her marital life would improve long after it was clear that she was the only one dedicated to the marriage despite a very rocky relationship with her in-laws. She was distraught the day she filed for divorce. Watching how this step to end her marriage changed people's perception of her and her social standing was painful.

Yet Priya found satisfaction in her work and solace in the other activities she undertook as she tried to pull herself together even as her marriage collapsed. She moved cities and changed jobs and continued to work towards financial independence and provide support to her ageing parents.

Priya’s advice to women who are going through a divorce is to face the hardships that come but to remain steadfast and hold yourself steady. "You may lose your sleep, you may lose your health, but don't lose your balance." she says. She insists that asking for help is essential to rebuild your life and knowing who to ask for the kind of help is a necessary step in healing and moving on.

Listen to how Priya figured out her life once she decided to go for a divorce. You will find it inspiring.

Whether you are thinking about divorce, have left an unhappy marriage or are curious about how women fare after divorce, do listen and let me know your thoughts.

Please rate and review the show!

If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a five-star rating and review, and subscribe!

Your reviews help me reach more listeners with the important message that it’s never too late to rewrite your happily ever after.

Let’s keep the conversation going!

Connect with me at https://www.ranjanirao.com. Follow me on Instagram @ranjaniwriter, on Facebook @ranjaniwriter and on Twitter @ranjaniwriter

To submit a question or be featured as a guest on my show, email [email protected] or drop a comment below.

In this brutally honest and deeply moving sixth interview in the Desi Divorce Discussion series, I’m speaking with Usha, who I know through a friend. She read my book, Rewriting My Happily Ever After – a memoir of divorce and discovery, and then connected with me via email. When I requested her to be guest on my podcast, she readily agreed.

Usha lives in the UK and has had a life that has been full of ups and downs. Yet, despite the difficulties she faced as a young woman and mother trying her best to make a life for herself and secure custody of her child, she was willing to talk about it on the podcast.

The point of the  desi divorce discussions on this podcast, is to shed light on the various types of divorce stories that are out there. Much has changed since the nineties when Usha struggled to provide evidence that she could be a single mother AND provide for child. But the sad reality is that women are still hesitant to step out of unhappy marriages and continue to be judged, manipulated and coerced into toeing the line.

From a young age Usha was branded as 'too much" for having an unbridled zest for life and love for learning and pushing boundaries. Usha's story is one of passion, enthusiasm for life and an eagerness to learn and improve and add value to herself. Her journey took her from Chennai to the middle-east and then to the UK where she now lives. She remarried after her divorce and is now widowed.

While Usha's life has been marked by years of struggle it has also been redeemed by moments of transcendence. It is a story that everyone needs to listen if you want to know what the long road of life after divorce holds.

Usha's three-pronged advice to women who hesitate to leave an unhappy marriage is exactly what women need today:

1. Know who you are
2. Know what you want from life
3. Decide what it is you are willing to give up

Listen to Usha's story of her long fight to have access to her child and how she kept moving following her soul's guidance.

Whether you are thinking about divorce, have left an unhappy marriage or are curious about how women fare after divorce, do listen and let me know your thoughts.

Please rate and review the show!

If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a five-star rating and review, and subscribe!

Your reviews help me reach more listeners with the important message that it’s never too late to rewrite your happily ever after.

Let’s keep the conversation going!

Connect with me at https://www.ranjanirao.com. Follow me on Instagram @ranjaniwriter, on Facebook @ranjaniwriter and on Twitter @ranjaniwriter

To submit a question or be featured as a guest on my show, email [email protected] or drop a comment below.

In this deeply honest fifth interview in the Desi Divorce Discussion series, I’m speaking with Manjula, who read my book, Rewriting My Happily Ever After – a memoir of divorce and discovery, and then connected with me via Twitter.

Manjula is an engineer by training but the one thing that we have in common is a love for reading and writing. In fact, Manjula wrote and published a novel during the pandemic. Manjula lives in Tiruvananthapuram, in Kerala, India and has two teenage children.

Quite often people wonder if women with more than one child and without a job would be bold enough to walk out of an unhappy marriage. After her divorce nice years ago, Manjula gave up her job in order so spend more time with her children. She moved to a town with a reasonable cost of living and figured out her savings and investment in order to do so.

Support and solace has come from multiple sources - friends, neighbours, books, music and writing. In spite of her challenges - due to her health condition and Covid-19, she now lives with her parents but has used the time during the pandemic to to write a novel.

Manjula's advice to women who hesitate to leave an unhappy marriage is to listen to their heart. "We tend to exaggerate the happiness of others while minimising our own misery. While life after divorce is not easy, it is certainly a better place to be," says Manjula.

Listen to Manjula’s uplifting story of following her heart and crafting a better story for herself and her children. It was only after her divorce that she took steps to fulfil her 'harmless' wishes like traveling within and outside India.

Whether you are thinking about divorce, have left an unhappy marriage or are curious about how women fare after divorce, do listen and let me know your thoughts.

Please rate and review the show!

If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a five-star rating and review, and subscribe!

Your reviews help me reach more listeners with the important message that it’s never too late to rewrite your happily ever after.

Let’s keep the conversation going!

Connect with me at https://www.ranjanirao.com. Follow me on Instagram @ranjaniwriter, on Facebook @ranjaniwriter and on Twitter @ranjaniwriter

To submit a question or be featured as a guest on my show, email [email protected] or drop a comment below.

Today I am in conversation with a very special guest, Prachi Vaish. While my previous guests shared their divorce journeys with us, Prachi, a couples therapy expert, has been through the ups and downs of relationships with each of her clients.

Prachi S Vaish is the founder of The Emotional Wellness Initiatives, an an online psychological wellbeing services platform. Prachi has been offering  online therapy in India since 2009. By qualification, Prachi is a licensed Clinical Psychologist, psychotherapist and a Certified Trauma Recovery expert. She has been practicing as a mental health professional for over 16 years and her areas of expertise are couples and intimacy, relationships, and recovery from trauma of abuse.

In this frank conversation about marital relationships and their current state in India (and among Indians the world over), Prachi had several interesting things to share about:

1. When do couples approach therapists for help
2. How stereotypical expectations of each member of the family affect married couples
3. What tools Prachi uses when she works with couples
4. What motivated Prachi to jump into this profession
5. How trauma of toxic and abusive marriages leave scars that need professional assistance to truly move forward

Whether you are single, happily married, considering or going through divorce or helping someone through a relationship breakdown,  please listen to this episode to get insights that may help you or the ones you love.

Well-wishers with good intentions are not trained to provide the kind of professional support needed by couples who are struggling to build a loving, lasting, enabling relationship in the midst of other daily challenges of life.

You can contact Prachi through The Emotional Wellness Initiatives.

Thank you for listening. Please rate and review the show!

If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a five-star rating and review, and subscribe!

Your reviews help me reach more listeners with the important message that it’s never too late to rewrite your happily ever after.

Let’s keep the conversation going!

Connect with me at https://www.ranjanirao.com. Follow me on Instagram @ranjaniwriter, on Facebook @ranjaniwriter and on Twitter @ranjaniwriter

To submit a question or be featured as a guest on my show, email [email protected] or drop a comment below.

"Take charge of your attitude. Don't let someone else choose it for you" ~ Dale Carnegie

In this fabulous fourth interview in the Desi Divorce Discussion series, I'm speaking with Neha, who read my book, Rewriting My Happily Ever After – a memoir of divorce and discovery, and then connected with me.

Neha and I have a few things in common. She is a single mom who lives in Hyderabad, India and whose daughter is her main pillar of support. Sounds familiar? Those who have read my book will know the overlapping themes of our life right away. 

Like many of her generation, Neha was brought up to believe that marriage is integral to your life and that one always needs to make it work. Her wedding was arranged through known family members and not surprisingly, it took a lot of soul searching before Neha could take the decision to leave after almost twenty years. Overcoming self-doubt and her self-confessed devotion to perfection has taken time and a lot of effort but you can hear the strength of conviction in Neha's voice as she candidly talks about her journey.  

Listen to Neha's inspiring story of figuratively taking the driver's seat at a vulnerable moment knowing that she needs to take charge of her life and make things happen. Finding out what you are capable of and what you need to let go are both empowering actions that Neha has taken. Today Neha has the support, respect and admiration of her family and friends as she boldly navigates her life and also gives back to society through a school that she runs. 

Whether you are thinking about divorce, have left an unhappy marriage or are curious about how women fare after divorce, do listen and let me know your thoughts.

Please rate and review the show!

If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a five-star rating and review, and subscribe!

Your reviews help me reach more listeners with the important message that it’s never too late to rewrite your happily ever after.

Let’s keep the conversation going!

Connect with me at https://www.ranjanirao.com. Follow me on Instagram @ranjaniwriter, on Facebook @ranjaniwriter and on Twitter @ranjaniwriter

To submit a question or be featured as a guest on my show, email [email protected] or drop a comment below.

“True life is lived when tiny changes occur” ~ Leo Tolstoy 

I am excited to share the third interview in the Desi Divorce Discussion series. This time I'm speaking with Sneha, a new friend I made through my book, Rewriting My Happily Ever After – a memoir of divorce and discovery. 

Sneha, who comes from Tiruppur in Tamil Nadu, posted a story on Instagram after reading my book. This set the stage for connection and our friendship. I followed her posts and stories, specially when she shared details about her life as a single mom and her new-found interest in music which she has been nurturing since her divorce.

If you have read my book, you know that music gave me solace at moments in my life when I felt there was nothing to look forward to.

Sneha's biggest barrier to walking out of her unhappy marriage was the pressure from family and society. But now, her parents have become her greatest supporters. After raising Sneha to be a "family girl", they were not prepared to see her step into a lonely life, they had not seen other divorced women before. Yet, now, Sneha accompanies her father on his business trips at construction sites where she is the only woman! 

Listen to Sneha's inspiring journey from being an obedient daughter to taking up the responsibility of being the captain of her own ship. Divorce brought out the best of her qualities and allowed her to soar, says Sneha. She added to her credentials, she became an entrepreneur and when the pandemic hit, she once again moved into a different role. 

When people find out she is a single mom, they say 'sorry' which she finds strange. If you see Sneha, who is all smiles, you know that she doesn't need condolences for a broken marriage but congratulations for having come out of it stronger and better. 

Whether you are thinking about divorce, have left an unhappy marriage or are curious about how women fare after divorce, do listen and let me know your thoughts.

Please rate and review the show!

If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a five-star rating and review, and subscribe!

Your reviews help me reach more listeners with the important message that it’s never too late to rewrite your happily ever after.

Let’s keep the conversation going!

Connect with me at https://www.ranjanirao.com. Follow me on Instagram @ranjaniwriter, on Facebook @ranjaniwriter and on Twitter @ranjaniwriter

To submit a question or be featured as a guest on my show, email [email protected] or drop a comment below.

I am excited to share the second interview with Shan, a new friend I made through my book, Rewriting My Happily Ever After – a memoir of divorce and discovery.

Shan contacted me on Instagram back in January 2022 after reading my book. It was recommended to her in her single parents support group. She felt that the book resonated with me on many levels and wanted to let me know how it had impacted her. Shan and I may have crossed paths unknowingly because she had lived in Singapore during her difficult marriage and had returned to India to sort things out. 

How I wish we had met in person in Singapore! Yet, the universe has its mysterious ways and now we are in touch through social media and phone calls. 

Shan's wake up call to leave her marriage came when her body gave her unmistakeable hints and a final ultimatum to tackle what was clearly not working. Listen to her amazing story of how she got back on her feet, literally and figuratively, restored her health and re-established her career and made a fresh start in a new place. 

With her mother's support who helped take care of her son as she encouraged her to "find her wings", Shan took a flying leap and now lives in Hong Kong with her son. 

Shan talks about the myth of 'self-made", the value of friendship, the hard work involved in creating a better life for yourself and your child. We also discuss how books about divorce do not highlight  the cultural nuances of our Indian backgrounds and how that affects our decision-making as well as our approach to life, something she felt made my book more relatable to her.

Whether you are thinking about divorce, have come out from an unhappy marriage or are curious about how women fare after divorce, do listen and let me know your thoughts.

Please rate and review the show!

If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a five-star rating and review, and subscribe!

Your reviews help me reach more listeners with the important message that it’s never too late to rewrite your happily ever after.

Let’s keep the conversation going!

Connect with me at https://www.ranjanirao.com. Follow me on Instagram @ranjaniwriter, on Facebook @ranjaniwriter and on Twitter @ranjaniwriter

To submit a question or be featured as a guest on my show, email [email protected] or drop a comment below.

My primary goal for this podcast was to create a space for discussions about 'desi divorce', a subject that is not spoken about. And today I am excited to share the first of these conversation right here on my podcast.

My first guest is Vani, a new friend I made through my book, Rewriting My Happily Ever After - a memoir of divorce and discovery.

In December 2021 I spent a few weeks in the US. On a weeklong trip to San Diego, I was at the beach at La Jolla on a sunny Saturday afternoon. The water and the sky was beautiful and blue, the air was clear and salty. Tourists lingered at various points taking pictures of a wedding on the beach, children licking ice cream cones or spotting large groups of seals sunning on the sands.

I took a picture of a lonesome seal, away from his friends, lying happily by himself and posted it on Instagram. Little did I know that the lazy seal would connect Vani and me. She was reading my book in San Diego and happened to not just find me on Insta but pointed out that the lone seal was something we had both spotted that same day.

We connected and spoke several times and when I asked her to be my first podcast guest, she wholeheartedly supported me by getting on a call despite our 15 hour time zone difference.

Vani shares the ups and downs of her divorce journey including the influence of family and cultural expectations. As she broke one self-limiting belief after another on her way to an independent life, she found that she "amazed herself".

Leaving behind a long marriage, bringing up a teenage son while dealing with the turmoil of a pandemic is not easy, yet Vani found helpful people, made genuine friends and discovered peace in books and routines and practices that helped make her the strong, positive and vibrant person that she is today.

Whether you are thinking about divorce, have come out from an unhappy marriage or are curious about how women fare after divorce, do listen and let me know your thoughts.

If you are curious about my story and would like to stay in touch with me (and receive a free chapter from my book), please sign up for my biweekly newsletter, Rewriting Your Happily Ever After - https://www.ranjanirao.com/newsletter-signup/. 

As always, please do share this podcast with whoever is ready for a fresh start and do get in touch with me over at my website - www.ranjanirao.com/podcast where you can find show notes and resources mentioned in this episode.

"It's never too late - in fiction or in life - to revise" ~ Nancy Thayer

In episode 2 of Rewriting YOUR Happily Ever after, I talk about the kind of questions I was asked when I shared the beta version of my book with readers and writers.

"Such a book about life after divorce is not relevant to Indian society because divorce is common and women are able to move ahead confidently"

"What is the goal for your book?"

My experience since the publication of my book has convinced me that not only is my book relevant for the times we live in but also that my book is certainly meeting it's goal of opening up conversations about divorce.

This episode includes an excerpt from my book. Do listen and see if it resonates with you.

And if you would like to download a free chapter, please sign up for my biweekly newsletter, Rewriting Your Happily Ever After - https://www.ranjanirao.com/newsletter-signup/

As always, please do share this podcast with whoever is ready for a fresh start and do get in touch with me over at my website - www.ranjanirao.com/podcast where you can find show notes and resources mentioned in this episode.

“He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how” ~ Friedrich Nietzsche

After my book, Rewriting My Happily Ever After - a memoir of divorce and discovery was published, people asked me a lot of "why" questions.

In this first episode of Rewriting YOUR Happily Ever after podcast, I describe my 3 WHYs for writing the book and for starting this podcast.

By answering the fundamental "Why" questions, we can clarify our reasons for doing something. It helps us do the hard work of applying ourselves to the task, of persevering, and powering through the tough times to reach our goal. 

Now that I am embarking on these conversations about divorce, it seemed like the right way to begin was by sharing my reasons as well as my hopes for this podcast.

I often turn to books for guidance and advice. In this episode I mention one of the most inspirational memoirs I have read - Man's Search for Meaning" by Viktor Frankl. If you're interested in this book and it's impact on me, check out this blogpost on my website.

You can count on hearing more about books that have informed, guided and shaped.

You can also find a small "starting over suggestion" at the end of every episode - something to think about or act upon as you embark on a journey of self-discovery and craft a path to rewriting your happily ever after.

If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a five-star rating and review, and please remember to subscribe!

Your reviews help me reach more listeners with the important message that it’s never too late to Rewrite YOUR Happily Ever After.

More about my book at www.ranjanirao.com.

To submit a question, email [email protected] or visit https://www.ranjanirao.com/contact/  and fill out the contact form.

Connect with me on Instagram: @ranjaniwriter

Twitter: @ranjaniwriter