––––=––––

Responsibility, responsibility—the responsibilities of life are everywhere.  We’re “supposed to” wear seat belts.  We’re “supposed to” clean our homes.  We’re “supposed to” do certain things for our spouse, our children, the people we sponsor.  On top of all this, we’re “supposed to” go to meetings and practice our program as best we can.  It’s no wonder that, sometimes, we want to run from all these tasks and escape to some far-off island where we’re not “supposed to” do anything!

At times like these, when we’ve become overwhelmed with our responsibilities, we have forgotten that responsibility need not be burdensome.  When we have a desire to run away from our responsibilities we need to slow down, remember why we have chosen them, and pay attention to the gifts they bring.  Whether it’s a job we normally find challenging and interesting, or a partner whose personality we are usually excited by, or a child whom we naturally like to play with and care for, there is joy to be found in all the responsibilities of our lives.

––––=––––

Just for today:  Each moment is special.  I will pay attention, grateful for my responsibilities and the special joys they bring.

November 17

Walking through the pain

“We never have to use again, no matter how we feel.  All feelings will eventually pass.”

It hurts like never before.  You get out of bed after a sleepless night, talk to God, and still don’t feel any better.  “It will pass,” a little voice tells you.  “When?” you wonder, as you pace and mutter and get on with your day.

You sob in your car and turn the radio all the way up so you can’t hear your own thoughts.  But you go straight to work, and don’t even think about using drugs.

Your insides feel as though they’ve been torched.  Just when the pain becomes unbearable, you go numb and silent.  You go to a meeting and wish you were as happy as other members seem to be.  But you don’t relapse.

You cry some more and call your sponsor.  You drive to a friend’s house and don’t even notice the beautiful scenery because your inner landscape is so bleak.  You may not feel any better after visiting your friend—but at least you didn’t visit the connection instead.

You listen to a Fifth Step.  You share at a meeting.  You look at the calendar and realize you’ve gotten through another day clean.

Then one day you wake up, look outside, and realize it’s a beautiful day.  The sun is shining.  The sky is blue.  You take a deep breath, smile again, and know that it really does pass.

––––=––––

Just for today:  No matter how I feel today, I’ll go on with my recovery.

November 16, 2019

Alone no more

Page 334

Many of us spent much of our using time alone, avoiding other people-especially people who were not using-at all costs. After years of isolation, trying to find a place for ourselves in a bustling, sometimes boisterous fellowship is not always easy. We may still feel isolated, focusing on our differences rather than our similarities. The overwhelming feelings that often arise in early recovery-feelings of fear, anger, and mistrust-can also keep us isolated. We may feel like aliens but we must remember, the alienation is ours, not NA's.

In Narcotics Anonymous, we are offered a very special opportunity for friendship. We are brought together with people who understand us like no one else can. We are encouraged to share with these people our feelings, our problems, our triumphs, and our failures. Slowly, the recognition and identification we find in NA bridge the lonely gap of alienation in our hearts. As we've heard it said-the program works, if we let it.

Just for Today: The friendship of other members of the fellowship is a life-sustaining gift. I will reach out for the friendship that's offered in NA, and accept it.

Copyright (c) 2007-2019,  NA World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved

November 15

Letting go

How do we begin the process of letting our Higher Power guide our lives?  When we seek advice about situations that trouble us, we often find that our Higher Power works through others.  When we accept that we don’t have all the answers, we open ourselves to new and different options.  A willingness to let go of our preconceived ideas and opinions opens the channel for spiritual guidance to light our way.

At times, we must be driven to the point of distraction before we are ready to turn difficult situations over to our Higher Power.  Anxiously plotting, struggling, planning, worrying—none of these suffice.  We can be sure that if we turn our problems over to our Higher Power, through listening to others share their experience or in the quiet of meditation, the answers will come.

There is no point in living a frantic existence.  Charging through life like the house is on fire exhausts us and gets us nowhere.  In the long run, no amount of manipulation on our part will change a situation.  When we let go and allow ourselves access to a Higher Power, we will discover the best way to proceed.  Rest assured, answers derived from a sound spiritual basis will be far superior to any answers we could concoct on our own.

––––=––––

Just for today:  I will let go and let my Higher Power guide my life.

A small yogic exercise to make you feel better. 

God Bless

Surrender and acceptance are like infatuation and love.  Infatuation begins when we encounter someone special.  Infatuation requires nothing but the acknowledgement of the object of our infatuation.  For infatuation to become love, however, requires a great deal of effort.  That initial connection must be slowly, patiently nurtured into a lasting, durable bond.

It’s the same with surrender and acceptance.  We surrender when we acknowledge our powerlessness.  Slowly, we come to believe that a Power greater than ourselves can give us the care we need.  Surrender turns to acceptance when we let this Power into our lives.  We examine ourselves and let our God see us as we are.  Having allowed the God of our understanding access to the depths of ourselves, we accept more of God’s care.  We ask this Power to relieve us of our shortcomings and help us amend the wrongs we’ve done.  Then, we embark on a new way of life, improving our conscious contact and accepting our Higher Power’s continuing care, guidance, and strength.

Surrender, like infatuation, can be the beginning of a lifelong relationship.  To turn surrender into acceptance, however, we must let the God of our understanding take care of us each day.

––––=––––

Just for today:  My recovery is more than infatuation.  I have surrendered.  Today, I will nurture my conscious contact with my Higher Power and accept that Power’s continuing care for me.

"No matter how far we ran, we always carried fear with us."

Basic Text, p. 14

For many of us, fear was a constant factor in our lives before we came to Narcotics Anonymous. We used because we were afraid to feel emotional or physical pain. Our fear of people and situations gave us a convenient excuse to use drugs. A few of us were so afraid of everything that we were unable even to leave our homes without using first.

As we stay clean, we replace our fear with a belief in the fellowship, the steps, and a Higher Power. As this belief grows, our faith in the miracle of recovery begins to color all aspects of our lives. We start to see ourselves differently. We realize we are spiritual beings, and we strive to live by spiritual principles.

The application of spiritual principles helps eliminate fear from our lives. By refraining from treating other people in harmful or unlawful ways, we find we needn't fear how we will be treated in return. As we practice love, compassion, understanding, and patience in our relationships with others, we are treated in turn with respect and consideration. We realize these positive changes result from allowing our Higher Power to work through us. We come to believe-not to think, but to believe that our Higher Power wants only the best for us. No matter what the circumstances, we find we can walk in faith instead of fear.

Just for Today: I no longer need to run in fear, but can walk in faith that my Higher Power has only the best in store for me.