The Healing Trauma Podcast

In this conversation, Monique Koven and Alison Cook discuss the importance of acknowledging and embracing our emotions rather than brushing them aside or numbing them. They explore the concept of naming our emotions as a way to bring order and relief to our inner world. They emphasize the need for self-compassion and curiosity when it comes to our emotions, and the importance of pausing and reflecting before taking action. The conversation also touches on the healing journey of trauma survivors and the role of framing our emotions in a healthy way. Overall, the conversation highlights the practices of naming, awareness, framing, and braving as essential tools for emotional well-being.

Key words emotions, naming, order, relief, self-compassion, curiosity, pausing, reflecting, trauma, healing, framing, braving, emotional

Takeaways

• Acknowledging and embracing our emotions is important for our emotional well-being.
• Naming our emotions brings order and relief to our inner world.
• Self-compassion and curiosity are key in dealing with our emotions.
• Pausing and reflecting before taking action allows for wiser decision-making.
• The healing journey of trauma survivors involves learning to name and honor their emotions.
• Framing our emotions in a healthy way helps us understand and respond to them effectively.
• Braving involves taking action based on our emotional awareness and understanding.

• Embracing Our Emotions: The Key to Emotional Well-being
• Healing Trauma: Learning to Name and Honor Our Emotions

• "I shouldn't feel this way has become for me a little bit of a, oh, I feel something. I feel something I don't want to feel."
• "The truth sets us free. This is what I feel. I'm not gaslighting myself. I'm not trying to dupe myself into not feeling what I really feel."
• "Numbing is to try to keep those emotions outside of our conscious awareness. Naming is bringing them up into the surface and looking at them."

Dr. Alison Cook's Website & Resources

dralisoncook.com

Support: Buy me a coffee. https://www.buymeacoffee.com/TheHealingtraumapodcast

Become a friend of the podcast. Your $ 2.99 support goes directly towards keeping the healing conversation going. Get access to extended and or bonus episodes.podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/monique34/subscribe

Meet with Monique

https://www.thehealingtraumapodcast.com/work-with-monique/

With Mother's Day approaching I'm re-releasing a special episode with psychologist and trauma expert Dr. Arielle Schwartz. In this episode, Monique Koven and Dr. Arielle Schwartz discuss the complexities of Mother's Day and the impact it can have on individuals with trauma. They explore the range of emotions that can arise, including happiness, sadness, guilt, and shame. They emphasize the importance of self-compassion and attending to the sacred wounds of the past. They also discuss the role of attachment and how our experiences with our mothers shape our sense of self. The conversation highlights the healing potential of acknowledging and validating our feelings and offering love and compassion to ourselves.

Keywords

Mother's Day, trauma, emotions, self-compassion, attachment Mother's Day can bring up a range of complex emotions for individuals with trauma, including happiness, sadness, guilt, and shame. It is important to practice self-compassion and attend to the sacred wounds of the past. Our experiences with our mothers shape our sense of self and can lead to feelings of responsibility and confusion. Acknowledging and validating our feelings is essential for healing and creating space for self-love and compassion. Attachment plays a significant role in our relationship with our mothers and our ability to offer love and compassion to ourselves. The Range of Emotions on Mother's Day Practicing Self-Compassion and Healing Sacred Wounds "Mother's Day is approaching, we start to feel this almost as countdown of a complexity of feelings."

"We learn to push down our authentic feelings because somebody else gave us this message that they couldn't handle our feelings."

"What is true for you is welcome here now." Grateful for Dr. Arielle Schwartz enormous contribution to the work of Trauma Recovery and Healing.

Check out her website for details on her books and resources.https://drarielleschwartz.com/

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Meet with Monique for a consult to talk about the healing journey.https://www.thehealingtraumapodcast.com/

This episode is a recent recording from psychologist Dr. Alison Cook's podcast "The Best Of You' where I was a guest. Taken from her podcast description

'Today’s episode is just so special and so deeply personal. If you’ve experienced trauma, please listen. If you love someone, please listen. Trauma touches so many lives, and it’s so often misunderstood. In today’s episode, Monique Koven, host of The Healing Trauma podcast, shares her powerful story of healing from trauma. There is absolute gold in this episode for everyone."

Support the podcast.

Become a friend of the podcast and in return for your support you will have access to bonus content that may include extended and or additional episodes or early access releases. Your support helps to cover the practical costs of keeping things running.

Subscriber Bonus Ep: Title: Managing The Past In The Present

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Buy Me A Coffee

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The Best Of You Podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-best-of-you/id1620059010

You Are Safe Now: A Survivor's Guide to Listening to Your Gut, Healing from Abuse, and Living in Freedom. https://hubs.la/Q02jwKsh0

Healing Trauma Podcast website https://www.thehealingtraumapodcast.com/

In this trauma healing conversation, I am joined with Tricia Lott Williford & Jana Richardson, MA, LPC, authors of the book, You Are Safe Now: A Survivor's Guide to Listening to Your Gut, Healing from Abuse, and Living in Freedom. This conversation is so unique as you will hear from both sides of the Trauma healing journey. Tricia shares from her perspective of feeling stuck in overwhelm & PTSD, and how she was able to slowly move through with the gentle support and guidance of her skilled therapist. Jana shares what it was like working with Tricia and what really helped and supported her through. They talk about the process of untangling the trauma and coming to the understanding of grooming, manipulation and sexual and spiritual abuse by a person of trust.

This episode is available to watch on Spotify or on Youtube https://youtu.be/gbGys_jRHCw

About The book

You Are Safe Now offers a survivor’s first hand story of abuse in the church, including an explanation of the nature of abusers and their common tactics; a compassionate, nuanced discussion of trauma responses; research, examples, and statistics to identify abusive dynamics, predation, grooming, and psychological manipulation; and practical tools and resources to facilitate recovery. For survivors of abuse, counselors, therapists, pastors who treat survivors, and those who support survivors in their healing, You Are Safe Now is an indispensable resource. Get the book here https://a.co/d/7MhcwNm

About The Guests & Authors

Tricia Lott Williford is a writer, blogger, teacher, and co-host of the podcast Let’s Talk Soon with her brother Rob. A prolific writer and ghostwriter, Tricia is the author of many books. She lives in Colorado with her family. Connect with her and follow her writing at https://www.tricialottwilliford.com/. Jana Richardson, MA, LPC, and trained in EMDR, is a seasoned therapist with decades of expertise in counseling victims of trauma, grief, and addiction. Jana has presented internationally as a mental health educator with an emphasis in oncology. Jana lives in Colorado with her family. ⁠

It was an absolute pleasure to be joined by psychologist Dr. Dan Allender and therapist Cathy Loerzel for an incredible conversation about the journey of healing Trauma. Dan Allender and Cathy Loerzel are the authors of the book Redeeming Heartache: How Past Suffering Reveals Our True Calling. They are also the founders of The Allender Center. I really excited to sit down with them after reading the book and participating in story work. This episode is available to watch on Spotify or you listen on any of your favorite podcast platform. You can also watch the episode on video on youtube.YOUTUBE :www.youtube.com/@Thehealingtraumapodcast⁠ Paid Subscribers {FRIENDS OF THE PODCAST} Can enjoy the extended version of this episode which includes a conversation with Dr. Dan Allender where he shares some of his own story of childhood heachache and trauma and how he got into this healing work of over forty years. Subscribe here: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/monique34/subscribe Your support goes directly towards keeping the healing conversation going. Get access to extended and or bonus episodes. Coffee support: buy me a coffeehttps://www.buymeacoffee.com/TheHealingtraumapodcast Dr. Dan Allenderhas pioneered a unique therapy centered around his innovative theory and training in transforming betrayal, ambivalence, and powerlessness into faith, hope, and love. He is a professor of counseling psychology at The Seattle School and founder of The Allender Center, speaking on trauma, sexual abuse recovery, love and forgiveness, and intimacy. He’s a popular podcaster on The Allender Center Podcastand the author of multiple books, Health the Wondered Heart,The Wounded Heart,The Healing Path,To Be ToldandGod Loves Sex.Connect with Dr. Allender onFacebookorInstagramThe Allender Center Cathy Loerzel received her MA in Counseling Psychology in 2007 is the Co-Founder of The Allender Center at The Seattle School of Theology and Psychology and co-author ofRedeeming Heartache: How Past Suffering Reveals Your True Calling. She has spent the last 15 years developing the theory and methodology of a popular new coaching and therapeutic approach called Story Work that moves people through their past stories of heartache to heal and discover healthier ways of being in the world. You can find her here.https://www.cathyloerzel.com

Learning To Trust Friends & Others Bonus subscriber & get access to bonus content https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/monique34/subscribe

On Today's healing conversation you are going to get compassionate validation as well as some understanding around the impact of childhood trauma on the body and the brain. I am joined once again with my friend, Dr. Mark McNear. Mark is a survivor and a therapist that shares openly about the healing journey. I loved our conversation and think you will too. Mark shares his personal journey to help others in theirs in his book, Finding My Words, A Ruthless Commitment To Healing Gently After Trauma.

Youtube: https://youtu.be/YaMyG2KR5OA To listen or watch the video episode of the extended version of this episode where Mark guides us slowly through some regulating tools that he uses in his own private practice with his clients and uses himself. You can follow along and add them to your own tool box of self care. Regulating Tools are a very important to use as work to support your nervous system to feel more present and grounded.

LINK BELOW Become a friend of the podcast! Your support goes directly towards keeping the healing conversation going. Get access to extended and or bonus episodes. podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/monique34/subscribe Mark McNear's website: https://markmcnear.com/ "Finding My Words" book: https://www.amazon.com/Finding-My-Wor...

Today's conversation I am joined with author and psychologist Dr. Alison Cook. We talk about healing trauma, spiritual bypassing and the need for holistic and emotionally safe trauma informed care and education in our faith communities. Many who have experienced trauma as children have learned to adapt by disconnecting from their emotions & feelings. Faith communities need to be emotionally healthy places where compassion and empathy is extended to those suffering not only spiritually but emotionally as well. Alison shares the importance of not denying one’s emotional experience, and instead to begin to gently turn towards them with curiosity and compassion. Become a friend of the podcast and get access to extended episodes and or deeper dives & and bonus content/episodes. You will also have access to the video episode if you prefer to watch and listen. Deeper dives and personal reflections go into a little more depth about some of the themes discussed in the episode. Subscribe now and get instant access to the extended version of this episode and join Alison and myself as she gently she guides us in a "practice called meeting a part." Plus listen to a bonus reflection episode where the themes of the episode go into more depth about trauma. https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/monique34/subscribe “Dr. Alison Cook is a psychologist and the author of two books, including her new book,The Best of You(Thomas Nelson 2022) andBoundaries for Your Soul(Thomas Nelson 2018). For 20 years, Alison has helped women, ministry leaders, couples, and families learn how to heal painful emotions, develop confidence from the inside out, forge healthy relationships, and fully live out their God-given potential.” Connect Online: Website:dralisoncook.com Instagram:@dralisoncook Facebook:@dralisoncook Her Podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/the-best-of-you/id1620059010

Monique shares a little bit more about why this season of The Healing Trauma Podcast is including Faith in the conversation.*This is a video episode on Spotify Faith Communities need to be safe places and trauma-informed. How essential it is to understand that trauma lives in the body and is not just in the mind and how it shows up in relationships and in daily living. How Healing happens Some ideas on upcoming episodes. Expert guests trauma and faith informed authors, therapists, psychologists, coaches, faith leaders and more. Support this podcast and get bonus content including extra episodes only available to subscribers. https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/monique34/subscribe

Come join my guest Amy Nordhues and I as we talk about the journey of rediscovering the truth about who we really are after surviving childhood trauma. Amy Nordhues is a survivor of both childhood sexual abuse and sexual abuse as an adult at the hands of a mental health professional. She is the author of her memoir Prayed Upon. ... Support this podcast and get exclusive content in return. https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/monique34/subscribe Amy's Website https://www.amynordhues.comAmy’s book: https://www.amazon.com/Prayed-Upon-Br...