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Where do meditation and pshycology intersect? and who are you anyway? With nico hase

59m · Intimacy with the world · 03 Jun 13:05

A conversation with psychologist and meditation teacher nico hase, whose life revolves around long retreats and deep practice. Among other things, we speak about identity, the self, the differences between western psychology and eastern meditation practices, and to what purpose each of them serve.

  • How already at 14 - 15 years old there was distressing stuff going on in nico’s family, and how he was impacted by that. He didn’t know how to deal with all that anger and internal distress. Then he came across a book by meditation teacher Joseph Goldstein, and that turned everything around…
  • Joseph’s book, Insight Meditation, spoke about suffering being an inevitable part of life - AND about the path out of suffering.
  • nico tells us about the experiences of his first meditation retreat, both the difficulties, but also a small opening, and with that a realisation that this could actually lead to peace of mind.
  • Only 18 years old he did a moth long retreat. At 19 a 5 months retreat, and shortly after that he became a zen-monk and moved into a zen-monastery.
  • nico says he feels that meditation saved him, and he tells us about the intense practice at the zen-centre.
  • How nico has practiced intensely both in the zen tradition, the insight tradition and the Tibetan Buddhist tradition.
  • Good zen books to read: Shunryu Suzuki: “Zen-mind beginners mind” and “Enlightenment unfolds” by teachers at San Fransisco zen-centre.
  • How meeting his future wife, Devon, while still at the zen-centre also introduced him to Tibetan Buddhism.
  • How meeting Mingyur Rinpoche, a renowned Tibetan teacher, made him go fully into Tibetan Buddhism.
  • How looking back at the suffering he experienced when he was very young, is interesting, because now, he can hardly recognise that person.
  • How his meditation training has made him able to work constructively with his mind when he gets thrown or upset.
  • nico’s thoughts on comparison between western psychology (he has a phd in psychology) and meditation practice, and how the ultimate goal of the two practices is very different.
  • How to bring your mind into a more peaceful state with meditation.
  • How to break the grip that your thoughts normally have on you, and how you can then look at your mind, and see your mind clearly, and how from there you can slowly learn to let go.
  • How the goal in psycho therapy is to get people who are in distress back to normal, whereas in Buddhist practice, it is assumed that you are already pretty healthy when you start, and your seeking is more existential, and the goal is enlightenment.
  • How it came about that nico not so long ago changed his name
  • How intense meditation practice does bring about big changes in our inner self, and how ingrained patterns can fall away.
  • We talk about how identity is more of a process and less of a fixed, defined, static and reliable entity.
  • How not having to defend this fixed personality is liberating.
  • We talk about how to be with and support someone who is feeling a lot of distress: to just be with them, and let them know that all these feelings are normal and okay
  • How it doesn’t work to give somebody advise who didn’t ask for it.

www.devonandnicohase.com

www.duritaholm.com

The episode Where do meditation and pshycology intersect? and who are you anyway? With nico hase from the podcast Intimacy with the world has a duration of 59:19. It was first published 03 Jun 13:05. The cover art and the content belong to their respective owners.

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A conversation with the former chief editor of Esquire magazine, who abandoned all that outer success to become a ful-time yogi. He is now a renovned meditation teacher and author.

This is some of what we speak about:

  • Phillip tells us how in his early life he was both a work aholic as an entrepreneur, but at the same time he never put aside his interest in his inner life, which back then was expressed in his yoga practice.
  • his big concern was always what gives meaning to life
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  • These revelations that have come to Philip regularly, he calls intuition.
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Phillip Moffitt's websites: www.dharmawisdom.org & https://lifebalance.org/institute/

Link to my course, Rewilding the Soul - Restoring Lifeforce & connecting to aliveness through nature & mindfulness:  app.mastermind.com/masterminds/29462

My website : www.duritaholm.com

The most important question in life: What is sacred to you? with John Lockley, african Shaman/Sangoma

John Lockley is a South African Shaman or Sangoma. He is also the author of the book: Leopard Warrior. We start our conversation by talking about how the principles of shamanism are the same all over the world, even in cultures that haven't had any contact for millennia.

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  • enlightenment in shamanism is not a stage you attain, it is rather a continuous giving yourself away through prayer, gratitude and ceremony.
  • the true centre of the human being is actually the foot. and the foot connects you to the hara. John Lockley talks about how the base of the feet in ceremonial trance dancing, gives you that deep connection to the earth, actually feeling the earth.
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  • We speak about how trance-dancing connects us to the mystery, with the elemental forces of nature, at through that connection we can receive the wisdom downloads from the great mystery.
  • John tells us how being in nature is part of his spiritual practice. Listening to the land, the wind, and his to his own body, the rhythm, heartbeat and breathing. And how the walking can even bring him into trance.
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  • We speak about what the soul is. To John, it is the immortal part of us, and through the shamanistic practices, including our dreams, we can connect to the soul.
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  • The reason for someones struggles with soullesness, is due to a lack of magic in their life. A lack of wonder...
  • One of the questions to ask to enter into that kind of wonder, is to start with the question: "what brings you joy?"
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John's website: www.johnlockley.com

Link to my course, Rewilding the Soul - Restoring Lifeforce & connecting to aliveness through nature & mindfulness: https://durita75.mastermind.com/masterminds/29462

My website :www.duritaholm.com

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Anne Cushman tells us how she came to meditation when at university, because this world-religions class was the only class that would allow her to sleep in, as it started at 11 o'clock. Then, of course she found that she loved the class, and all its existential issues. And she ended up getting her major in religion, focusing particularly on Buddhism and Hinduism.

However, reading all these books about buddhism and Hinduism, it became clear to her, that this couldn't be just theoretical, that she would have to start practicing meditation and yoga to truly understand the texts.

We are compelled to continue practicing meditation because there is pain and suffering in our lives, and in meditation and yoga, we find a way through that pain and hardship - a learning to be with life as it is.

The overarching theme of Anne's book, The mama sutra, is the path to awakening through motherhood

I ask Anne if having children isn't an impediment to awakening?

Anne tells us how the teachings were mostly passed down through monastics, who didn't

In any case, practice happens where the intention of our wise heart meets the reality of our lives, and that is so whether you are in a monastery or rocking a baby

Motherhood also makes you meet your edges, motherhood can me very hard...

Motherhood is so good at showing us where we are stuck, where we need to grow

Thich nah Han when asked, said that monastic and lay practice is exactly the same, only that lay practice is harder and more challenging

What Anne really wants to do in the mama sutra is depict the reality of motherhood. At how hard it actually is...

When things are harmonious, its great to practice, but always knowing, that things will change...

The fundamental teaching of mindfulness is, that you always start right where you are, so you can never rely only on your past practice, it is always here and now.

Children are unpredictable, immediate and authentic, so they call forth those qualities in us.

I ask Anne about how her years of prior practice supported her through the loss of a child, and then a year later the birth of her second child, who was very demanding as a baby.

Anne tells us how one of the effects of her meditation practice going through all that was the tremendous softening of her heart and being, instead of a hardening, which is also a possibility when life gets really difficult.

We are attached to life as primal as the umbilical cord, thick and coiled and throbbing with blood

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How we can train our capacity to hold our experience with more loving kindness

We speak about "who" or "what" this observer or witness in mindfulness is...

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We talk about the sacred feminine, or about how some experiences that women have can be qualitatively different. An honouring of the relational, the intuitive, the embodied, the connection to the earth...

Anne tells us how online retreats have been such a blessing for many women with children, and how real life reality can then be held in the support of a retreat.

If we are paying attention, one of the things we feel as we become a mother, is this intimate connection to the web of life, this cycle of life that sustains us all. Motherhood as a portal to loving all of life.

www.annecushman.com

www.duritaholm.com

Our life has all the ingredients to be our biggest and truest teacher! Trudy Goodman.

Trudy Goodman tells us how she came to meditation because although she had done everything right in life, exactly as was expected of a young woman, she still felt that something wasn't quite right, and she didn't understand why.

  • She also tells us about some big spiritual openings that she didn't understand, and hoped that maybe some spiritual teacher might be able to put into context.
  • Just keeping life together was challenging as a young single parent
  • The world of psychedelics, why do I have to be stoned to see the sacredness of the world, and she sought out a spiritual teacher together with her friend Jon Kabat-Zinn.
  • When we sit down with ourselves, we encounter the whole of who we are, if we dare to sit with it.
  • She tells us about two of her spiritual openings, one at childbirth and one when her daughter was very ill.
  • How we have to be aware that, even if we all have the same human heart and capabilities, every persons experience is so different, and how trauma f.ex. will inform how we experience meditation, or dropping into the body.
  • The importance of deep listening to other's experiences, and then learning from that.
  • Being sensitive and respectful to all those different identities in the world.
  • Trudy tells us about her shift from Zen to vipassana.
  • The pain of her divorce from a zen teacher was the catalyst for her change into the insight tradition.
  • Trudy speaks about how she and her husband, Jack Kornfield teach in very different ways.
  • The difference between zen and insight is like poetry and prose.
  • Trudy and I jump in to some pithy short zen- teachings.
  • Do whatever you do fully and completely.
  • I ask Trudy how mindfulness grows in someone who has practised for so many years.
  • Nobody is mindful 24/7, not even the greatest teachers, but the ability increases as we practice.
  • Slowly there is a shift, where being present and aware is most of the time, and you notice when you are lost.
  • When we can't accept ourselves, we are in conflict with ourselves.
  • Awareness is a light, that can shine on anything, even the darkest thing.
  • IFS internal family systems talks about the exiled parts of ourselves, to also accept them.
  • We speak about the term Loving awareness, coined by Ram Das.
  • Trudy tells us about how to acquire wisdom even at a young age.
  • Gratitude is a big part of wisdom!
  • Our life has all the ingredients to be our biggest and truest teacher!
  • In mindfulness we don't change what is happening, but rather we develop a loving wise relationship to whatever is happening.
  • The importance of trust, the trust that everything that happens to you, has some kind of meaning.
  • How a painful divorce taught Trudy to expand her window of tolerance and her compassion.
  • A huge part of our meditation practice is developing a heart that is open enough to hold opposite experiences
  • Trudy tells us about her memoir writing - her dharmemoir!
  • Trudy's website: www.trudygoodman.com
  • My website: www.duritaholm.com

The human soul's longing for mysticism and devotion, with meditation teacher Devon Hase

A conversation about meditation in different Buddhist traditions, especially the Theravada, where western mindfulness has its roots, and the quite different Tibetan vajrayana tradition.

These are some of the topics we speak about:

  • The power of having a lot of silent time in nature with your own heart and mind, how this connects you to yourself and how being with your own pain, opens your heart
  • She wrote her undergraduate thesis on meditation and ADHD
  • Why meditation has become so mainstream at this point in time, that it might also be because of all the scientific research shoving the benefits. This and all the challenges of our time, climate change, pandemics, anxiety, depression, insomnia.
  • We speak about what it means when we take the spirituality out of mindfulness, also with respect to cultural appropriation.
  • How Buddhism has always moved around into different cultures at different times, and it is interesting how it is adapting in our secularised cultures
  • What are the benefits of having a spiritual dimension to your meditation practice
  • The importance of becoming clear about our motivations for practising.
  • Buddha taught freedom from suffering - that is a radical promise!
  • How often unexpected things happen when you start meditating, and your practice and motivations might change
  • How going too deep too fast can be risky and even damaging
  • We speak about the differences between early Buddhism, the Theravada tradition and the Tibetan, vajrayana buddhist tradition.
  • The wildness of vajrayana buddhism
  • How the Theravada buddhism adapts better to a secular society.
  • How vajrayana buddhism is quite shamanic, mystical and magical, and actually takes some kind of devotion.
  • There is something in the human soul that longs for mysticism and devotion.
  • The sacredness of the world is missing today, and that might be at the root of our problems.
  • All indigenous traditions have this notion of the divine and the mystical
  • We speak about westerners teaching Tibetan, vajrayana buddhism
  • We speak about the progression from early buddhism to Mahayana and then vajrayana in Tibet
  • Devons thoughts about how we in the west have to be very respectful of the traditional and deeply culturally rooted practises of Tibetan buddhism, and how she is hesitant about our western way of appropriating these old practices, without perhaps always being ready for them.
  • I ask Devon if it is not a pulling back from life and society when she goes on these long retreats.
  • We speak about the danger of just wanting to escape from the world, when we go on long retreats
  • Retreat practice is such fertile ground for growing compassion, wisdom and equanimity, and when you come out of retreat you have so much energy and resourcefulness to engage with the communities, and how one also often develops much more creative responses to our challenges.
  • Does Devon think that deep meditative practice influence and contributes positively to the collective consciousness?
  • How intimacy with the world also means not turning away from the difficulty, for example climate change.
  • How retreat practice grows this feeling of deep belonging to nature, and how this intimacy fosters a different view, where we don't want to plunder natures resources.
  • Most things that are worth doing are difficult, and how sitting for long periods of time with your mind is messy and difficult, but its worth while to grow our hearts and minds.

Devon's website: https://devonandnicohase.com

My website: https://duritaholm.com

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