Complex PTSD and the Art of Survival with Author Stephanie Foo

Real Self-Care with Dr. Pooja Lakshmin

Have you ever put on a face mask, expecting it to solve all your mental health problems?

That seems…unrealistic, but it’s what self-care marketing tells us: get your self-care right, and all your difficulties will evaporate.

This week on It’s OK, Dr. Pooja Lakshmin, author of Real Self-Care, breaks down what “self-care” actually means when we’re living in a complex, capitalistic world. It’s an exploration of grief, burnout, and exhaustion, and what it takes to care for yourself inside systems that repeatedly ignore their part in your suffering.

In this episode we cover:

• Why self-care doesn’t work
• How hope is different than optimism
• Does looking for your own answers mean you have to do things alone?
• Accepting help as a bid for connection
• How Dr. Lakshmin’s definition of boundaries can help you practice real self-care

We're re-releasing some of our favorite episodes from the first 3 seasons. This episode was originally recorded in 2023.

Looking for a creative exploration of grief? Check out the best selling Writing Your Grief course here.

Follow the show on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and TikTok @refugeingrief

Related episodes:

Rage Becomes Her (and by “her” I mean US) with Soraya Chemaly

Living with Chronic Illness: A Conversation for Everyone with a Body with Sarah Ramey.

About our guest:

Dr. Pooja Lakshmin MD is a psychiatrist, a clinical assistant professor at George Washington University School of Medicine, and the founder and CEO of Gemma, the women’s mental health community centering impact and equity. She has spent thousands of hours taking care of women struggling with burnout, despair, depression, and anxiety in her clinical practice. Her debut non-fiction book, Real Self-Care: A Transformative Program for Redefining Wellness (Crystals, Cleanses, and Bubble Baths Not Included), is available in e-book, hardcover, and audiobook narrated by Pooja.

About Megan:

Psychotherapist Megan Devine is one of today’s leading experts on grief, from life-altering losses to the everyday grief that we don’t call grief. Get the best-selling book on grief in over a decade, It’s Ok that You’re Not OK, wherever you get books. Find Megan @refugeingrief

Additional Resources:

Read “Hope is Not a Thing to Have – It’s a Skill to Practice” at Oprah Daily

Read “How Society Has Turned Its Back on Mothers” at The New York Times

Read “Saying ‘No’ Is Self-Care for Parents” at The New York Times

Want to talk with Megan directly? Join our patreon community for live monthly Q&A grief clinics: your questions, answered. Want to speak to her privately? Apply for a 1:1 grief consultation here.

Check out Megan’s best-selling books - It’s OK That You're Not OK and How to Carry What Can’t Be Fixed

Books and resources may contain affiliate links.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Is There Any Good News on Climate Change? with Bill McKibben

We’re in a massive climate crisis, but it’s hard to think about it, isn’t it?

It’s a great temptation to shut our eyes to climate change. It’s overwhelming. This week on the show, climate activist and author Bill McKibben on facing the reality of the climate crisis, understanding what needs to change, and what you can do - not just to change the course of humanity and the planet, but to feel more hopeful and connected as this all unfolds.

In this episode we cover:

• Is halting climate change really dependent on personal recycling and whether we use plastic straws?
• Is it okay to have intense emotional responses to wildfires, floods, and the inaction of those “in charge”?
• How the boomer generation is using their experience and wealth to revisit the activism of their youth (and supporting younger activists at the same time)
• How talking about our fears and our ecological grief gives us common ground to fight for our future - and our present.

We're re-releasing some of our favorite episodes from the first 3 seasons. This episode was originally recorded in 2023.

Looking for a creative exploration of grief? Check out the best selling Writing Your Grief course here.

For more on activism in the face of impossible odds listen to these related episodes:

Women, Life, Freedom: Grief and Power In Iran, with Nazanin Nour

Wonder in an Age of Violence with Valarie Kaur & See No Stranger

About our guest:

Bill McKibben is an American environmentalist, author, and journalist who has written extensively on the impact of global warming. His books include The End of Nature, about climate change, and Falter: Has the Human Game Begun to Play Itself Out?, about the state of the environmental challenges facing humanity.

Bill is a contributing writer to The New Yorker (read his latest piece here), and founder of Third Act, which organizes people over the age of sixty for progressive change.

About Megan:

Psychotherapist Megan Devine is one of today’s leading experts on grief, from life-altering losses to the everyday grief that we don’t call grief. Get the best-selling book on grief in over a decade, It’s Ok that You’re Not OK, wherever you get books. Find Megan @refugeingrief

Additional Resources:

Terry Tempest Williams’ book Refuge: An Unnatural History of Family and Place, and her recent NYT article on Utah’s great Salt Lake (gift link, no subscription needed)

Explore Joanna Macy’s work on the intersection of grief and activism at her website, or her books, including Coming Back to Life: The Updated Guide to the Work That Reconnects, World as Lover, World as Self, and Widening Circles: A Memoir

Want to talk with Megan directly? Join our patreon community for live monthly Q&A grief clinics: your questions, answered. Want to speak to her privately? Apply for a 1:1 grief consultation here.

Check out Megan’s best-selling books - It’s OK That You're Not OK and How to Carry What Can’t Be Fixed

Books and resources may contain affiliate links.

Follow our show on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and TikTok @refugeingrief

For more information, including clinical training and consulting and to share your thoughts, visit us at refugeingrief.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

A Renaissance of Our Own: The Stories We Tell Ourselves with Rachel Cargle

Can grief be an opportunity for growth and self-understanding?

The answer, of course, is yes: but it’s a bit more complex than that. This week, author, philanthropist, activist Rachel Cargle on survival optimism, the resilience narrative, and why questioning the stories you tell yourself - with curiosity and kindness - is a powerful path of healing.

In this episode we cover:

• How was grief modeled for you growing up, and how does that affect later grief?
• Can your memory of childhood grief be… entirely wrong? (or at least, inaccurate)
• Can you do grief wrong?
• The difference between curiosity and judgment
• Is it ok to feel relieved when a sick person dies?
• Rachel’s new book, A Renaissance of Our Own

We're re-releasing some of our favorite episodes from the first 3 seasons. This episode was originally recorded in 2023.

Looking for a creative exploration of grief? Check out the best selling Writing Your Grief course here.

Related episodes:

Gabor Mate on why we celebrate trauma, aka: resilience

Illustrator Aubrey Hirsch on the power of storytelling as an act of healing

About our guest:

Rachel Cargle is a writer, entrepreneur and philanthropic innovator. Her new memoir, A Renaissance of Our Own, centers the reimagining of womanhood, solidarity and self. In 2018 she founded The Loveland Foundation, Inc., a non-profit offering free therapy to Black women and girls.

She’s also the founder of Elizabeth’s Bookshop & Writing Centre, a literacy space designed to amplify, celebrate and honor the work of writers who are often excluded from traditional cultural, social and academic canons. For more on her many endeavors, visit rachelcargle.com.

About Megan:

Psychotherapist Megan Devine is one of today’s leading experts on grief, from life-altering losses to the everyday grief that we don’t call grief. Get the best-selling book on grief in over a decade, It’s Ok that You’re Not OK, wherever you get books. Find Megan @refugeingrief

Additional Resources:

Read Rachel’s new book - A Renaissance of Our Own

The Great Unlearn – a self-paced, donation-based learning community

The Great Unlearn for Young Learners – an online learning space for young folks launching in 2022

Want to talk with Megan directly? Join our patreon community for live monthly Q&A grief clinics: your questions, answered. Want to speak to her privately? Apply for a 1:1 grief consultation here.

Check out Megan’s best-selling books - It’s OK That You're Not OK and How to Carry What Can’t Be Fixed

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Introducing: A Really Good Cry with Radhi Devlukia

Hi, IOTYNO fans! iHeartPodcasts is excited to tell you about A Really Good Cry - a brand new podcast here to guide you through life's toughest challenges. Hosted by cookbook author and lifestyle influencer Radhi Devlukia, this podcast takes on mental health, embracing the real, and living fuller, more healthy lives. We think you'll enjoy this podcast but don't just take our word for it. Check out this trailer to decide if this is your new weekly obsession!

Show Description:This podcast won’t solve all your problems, but it WILL go through them with you. Radhi Devlukia brings you a new weekly show called A Really Good Cry, a space where we can embrace the real, the messy and the beautiful parts of life that can be difficult to digest alone, together. Tune in for a good ole’ laugh, maybe shed a tear or two, and join a community where you can have a really good cry! There's no small talk here, we are diving straight in and it’s gonna get real. Whether it’s raw, unfiltered conversations, debate and discussions of different perspectives and life experiences or going on an emotional rollercoaster. A Really Good Cry is there for you to learn, connect, and find comfort together - that allows us to see the world and ourselves with a new perspective.

Tune in to A Really Good Cry today on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts!

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Live Each Day Like It’s Your First: with Alua Arthur

What would a meaningful life look like for you?

According to Death Doula Alua Arthur, conversations about death can be the most enriching conversations we have.

It’s not about accepting death, or avoiding grief - it’s about building a relationship with yourself and others that doesn’t hold anything back. Why should you listen? Yeah, because you’re mortal and one day you'll die, but more importantly: because one day, hopefully in the far off future, you’ll look back at this life you’ve lived. Conversations about death can make that life so much better.

Alua’s new book is Briefly Perfectly Human: Making an Authentic Life by Getting Real about the End. For more info visit aluaarthur.com

In this episode we cover:

• What’s a Death Doula?
• Does being honest about death give you access to joy?
• Should you tell someone that they’re dying, or does that remove hope?
• Why living each day like it’s your last is unrealistic (and what to do instead)
• The linking of death and grief: Death and grief are married, but grief definitely dates around.

We're re-releasing some of our favorite episodes from the first 3 seasons. This episode was originally recorded in 2023.

Looking for a creative exploration of grief? Check out the best selling Writing Your Grief course here.

Related episodes:

Trauma Surgeon Dr. Red Hoffman on the surprisingly broad umbrella of palliative care

The co-founders of the New York Zen Center for Contemplative Care on supporting burnout & stress among healthcare professionals & caregivers

About our guest:

Alua Arthur is a Death Doula, recovering attorney, and the founder of Going with Grace, a Death Doula training and end-of-life planning organization that exists to support people as they answer the question, “What must I do to be at peace with myself so that I may live presently and die gracefully?” She’s been featured in the LA Times, Vogue, Refinery29, The Doctors, and alongside Chris Hemsworth on the docuseries, Limitless. Find her at aluaarthur.com and on Instagram at @going_with_grace

About Megan:

Psychotherapist Megan Devine is one of today’s leading experts on grief, from life-altering losses to the everyday grief that we don’t call grief. Get the best-selling book on grief in over a decade, It’s Ok that You’re Not OK, wherever you get books. Find Megan @refugeingrief

Additional Resources:

Read Alua’s new book - Briefly Perfectly Human

Going with Grace

Megan mentions this book - Pronoia Is the Antidote for Paranoia

Want to talk with Megan directly? Join our patreon community for live monthly Q&A grief clinics: your questions, answered. Want to speak to her privately? Apply for a 1:1 grief consultation here.

Check out Megan’s best-selling books - It’s OK That You're Not OK and How to Carry What Can’t Be Fixed

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.