EP 449: Overcoming Blocks to Moving Forward with Margaret

EP 454: Navigating the Father Wound with Mariel

In this episode, Christine helps Mariel navigate the complex feelings following a breakup that has left her struggling to move on. Despite ending the relationship almost a year ago, Mariel finds herself still emotionally entangled and unable to let go. Christine delves into the deeper issues stemming from Mariel’s childhood, particularly her relationship with her father, to uncover the root causes of her emotional struggle.

Summary: Mariel ended a relationship due to her partner’s addiction issues, but she is finding it disproportionately difficult to move on. Christine explores the deeper emotional wounds from Mariel’s childhood, especially those related to her father, which may be contributing to her current emotional state. The conversation reveals the importance of addressing and healing childhood wounds to move forward in adult relationships.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

• Is there something on your mind you can't let go of, whether it's a relationship or something else?
• Have you been in a relationship with someone who had many good qualities but one major deal breaker?
• Do you often project your feelings or handling of situations onto others?
• Do you truly believe you are worthy of the kind of love you desire?

Guest Insights:

• Mariel feels confused about why she is struggling so much to move on from a relatively short relationship.
• The relationship ended due to her partner's addiction, a pattern familiar from her previous marriage.
• Despite setting boundaries and ending the relationship, Mariel finds herself still emotionally attached and missing her ex-partner.
• Mariel has a history of attracting men who cannot process their emotions healthily, reflecting unresolved issues with her father.

Aha Moments:

• Christine points out the importance of addressing the deeper issues from Mariel’s childhood to move on.
• Mariel recognizes that her ex-partner’s addiction and avoidance are reminiscent of her father’s emotional unavailability and anger.
• Understanding that her struggle is more about her own unresolved issues than about the ex-partner helps Mariel see the situation more clearly.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

• Identify and confront the truths about the past relationship to move on from the fantasy.
• Work on healing the father wound and improving self-worth.
• Focus on developing a nurturing relationship with the inner child to address unmet emotional needs.
• Prioritize self-love and boundaries to avoid falling into similar patterns in future relationships.

Sponsors:

• Cozy Earth: Get 30% off your purchase at CozyEarth.com/overit using promo code "OVERIT." Enjoy comfortable and temperature-regulating bedding products designed with viscose from bamboo.

Social Media Info:

• Follow Christine on Instagram @ChristineHassler
• Tweet your insights to Christine @ChristineHassler on Twitter
• Join us next week for another insightful episode where we help you get over it and on with the life you love.

CC: How to Build The Life, Career and Business You Love with Dean Graziosi

If you're feeling boxed in by your current path, maybe it's time to think about how your skills can open new doors—not just for others, but for yourself too. If you’ve ever thought about what it might be like to teach others what you know or create a business doing what you love, don’t miss this episode.

Your skills can be the key to unlocking new doors, not just for others, but for you too.

Tune in as my guest Dean Graziosi, New York Times bestselling author and esteemed entrepreneur, and I discuss what it takes to become an entrepreneur…how to overcome the fears and limiting beliefs and step into your legacy.

Together, Dean and Tony Robbins are hosting a FREE 3-day workshop on June 13th - 15th called “The Game Has Changed” with some amazing special guests. In this 3 day event they are going to reveal for the first time their “2024 roadmap to more” in today’s crazy economy. More freedom, more time, more joy, more income… more whatever makes YOU happy.

Go here to register: www.christinehassler.com/game

EP 453: How to Make Changes When You Don't Have Certainty or a Plan with Liv

In this episode, Christine Hassler coaches Liv, who is experiencing a significant life transition and is unsure about her career and future. Liv has worked with children as a teacher, babysitter, and nanny, but now she feels the urge to explore other professional paths. She struggles with guilt over leaving her current line of work and fears the uncertainty of pursuing new opportunities.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

• Are you feeling the urge to make a change or has a change been forced upon you?
• How did your upbringing shape your views on failure and success?
• Do you rely on your job as a safety net?
• What is your relationship with uncertainty, and are you willing to change your beliefs to improve it?

Guest Insights:

• Liv is transitioning from a familiar career working with children to exploring new professional opportunities.
• She feels overwhelmed by the thought of leaving a job that she loves but also wants to pursue personal growth.
• Liv struggles with balancing her desire to serve others with her need for self-fulfillment.
• She feels a deep need for control and certainty, which stems from her upbringing, where failure had severe consequences.
• Liv's primary challenge is to reprogram her beliefs and embrace uncertainty as part of her growth.

Aha Moments:

• Liv recognized that her current job should not be seen as a safety net but as a stepping stone to new opportunities.
• She identified the need to create a new relationship with uncertainty and develop an internal sense of safety.
• Liv realized that her belief that she cannot make money doing what she loves is a limiting belief that needs updating.

How to Get Over It:

• Liv should focus on updating her limiting beliefs, such as "I can't make money doing what I love" to "People are interested in what I have to offer and it adds value to their lives."
• Embrace the belief that prioritizing her own growth is not selfish but essential for serving others more effectively.
• Take one step at a time and recognize that safety and certainty come from within, not from external jobs or situations.
• Engage in pattern interrupt techniques to shift from fear-based decisions to ones based on authenticity and alignment.

Sponsor:

• Cozy Earth offers hypoallergenic, organic bamboo sheets that are breathable and comfortable. Use Promo Code “OVER IT" at cozyearth.com for 35% off

Social Media Info:

• • Follow Christine on Instagram @ChristineHassler
  • Tweet your insights to Christine @ChristineHassler on Twitter
  • Join us next week for another insightful episode where we help you get over it and on with the life you love.

CC: Is it infatuation or Limerence with Thais Gibson

Thais and Christine talk about what exactly "limerence" is and how it is different from the infatuationstage of a relationship. We go deep into what caused it and how we can get out of it. Thais Gibson has a Ph.D. and over 13 certifications in modalities such as CBT, NLP, somatic experiencing, internal family systems, and shadow work. She has nearly a decade of experience running a successful private practice. This diverse background has culminated in creating Gibson Integrated Attachment Theory™, an innovative framework uniting traditional attachment theory, developmental psychology insights, and potent subconscious reprogramming techniques that are woven throughout the course material within The Personal Development School, taught within our innovative coach training program and in her most recent book, Learning Love.
You can get 25% off the price of enrollment at The Personal Development School (https://university.personaldevelopmentschool.com/) if you use the promo code christine25off

Episode 452: The Opportunity That Failed Relationships Provide Us With, with Samantha

Welcome to Over It and On With It. I'm your host, Christine Hassler. For over a decade, I've been a life coach, speaker, and author. Each week, you'll hear me work directly with a caller as I coach them through a goal they want to accomplish or an obstacle they may be facing. I'll provide a blend of practical and spiritual advice as well as tangible actions you can apply to your own life. Now let's get on with the episode.

Summary

In this episode, Christine speaks with Samantha, who is struggling with emotional attachments to two past romantic relationships she ended. Despite being the one to end both relationships, Samantha finds herself constantly thinking about her ex-partners, missing the companionship, and fantasizing about what could have been. Christine helps Samantha uncover the deeper emotional issues rooted in her childhood, specifically her relationship with her father, which have influenced her current difficulties in moving on from these relationships.

Consider/Ask Yourself

• Are you ruminating or obsessing over past relationships?
• Do you have unresolved issues from childhood with your parents?
• Are you still hoping for one of your parents to change and give you what you always wanted?

Guest Insights

• Samantha admits that her attachment to past relationships is a way to avoid feeling the actual pain of their endings. She acknowledges that fantasizing about what could have been is a way to distract herself from the hurt.
• She identifies with a fearful avoidant attachment style, which she believes is linked to her "father wound." Samantha describes her father as someone who was both absent and inconsistent, leading to a deep-seated fear of being alone and unlovable.
• Christine helps Samantha realize that she has been projecting her unmet childhood needs onto her romantic relationships. Samantha's fear of being alone stems from childhood experiences and a longing for her father's approval and love.

Aha Moments

• Christine emphasizes that feeling the pain and moving through it is necessary to avoid repeating the same mistakes in future relationships. By not fully processing the pain, Samantha has been unable to move on.
• The concept of the "Christ year" at age 33 is significant for personal awakening and transformation. Samantha, being 33, is at a pivotal point where she can choose to either continue her old patterns or embrace deep healing and change.
• Christine advises Samantha to stop seeing her loneliness as a problem to fix but as a necessary phase to fully experience and understand. By doing this, Samantha can break the cycle of seeking relationships to fill the void left by her father.

How to Get Over It

• Feel the Loneliness: Samantha is encouraged to fully feel her loneliness without trying to escape it through distractions or new relationships. This process will help her develop resilience and self-reliance.
• Inner Child Healing: Christine suggests that Samantha engage in inner child work to address the unresolved issues with her father. This can involve journaling, therapy, and self-reflection to give her inner child the love and validation she missed.
• Seek Professional Help: Working with a therapist, especially one trained in somatic therapy, can help Samantha stay connected to her body and process her emotions in a healthy way.
• Practical Exercises: Samantha should write down the truth about her past relationships, focusing on what didn’t work, to ground herself in reality and avoid idealizing her ex-partners. Additionally, she should ask herself how her thoughts make her feel and if she likes feeling that way, then consciously choose thoughts that lead to feelings of peace and freedom.

Sponsor

• Storyworth: Preserve precious memories and stories from your father or father figures for years to come. Save $10 on your first purchase when you visit storyworth.com/overit.

• Social Media Info:

  • Follow Christine on Instagram @ChristineHassler
  • Tweet your insights to Christine @ChristineHassler on Twitter
  • Join us next week for another insightful episode where we help you get over it and on with the life you love.