How to Die Alone

Otter's up north got sad penis bones and faces FULL of powder! What's Emmet Otter's wife going to do? If you know, you know! Also on this week's tantalizing traumatizing episode of "How to Die Alone": -Matt beats a woman... at every game they play together -We learn Amanda a thing or two about the female experience -Matt notices shocking similarities between military personnel and frat bros (style choices) -Amanda yearns for a man with a boat to take her across the seas -A Canadian couple is upset that their poinsettia isn't dying like it's supposed to -Otter penis bones (baculums) are getting frail due to contaminants -Matt discovers river bricks, which are totally naturally occurring -San Francisco 49ers and Denver Broncos effectively can't play football because COVID said "no" -Ammo shortages ruin Christmas and people aren't able to put any shells in their family's stockings -A woman defends child labor in Africa as being pretty awesome and Amanda's grandmother used to tend the pineapple fields -and we review TikToks about a Jesus arts and crafts project, John Wick's home life, and a small Thanksgiving family gathering.

Davey plays "Air Ranch" in the new animated basketball comedy "Space Ham"! Also on this week's "How to Die Alone":

-Matt Williams watches dogs in an aviation themed neighborhood

-We review the amazing new (to us) invention, the KeyPort Pivot!

-A plane lands on a brown bear mother in Alaska

-Andrew Cuomo gets an Emmy nomination for his spectacular work in Aaron Sorkin's "COVID Press Briefings"

-We learn about physics and/or geometry through the art of watching someone be way too good at playing pool

-Foul mouthed swearing parrots have to be separated at a zoo to keep it PG

-Canadians are encouraged not to let mooses... meeses... moosen lick salt off their cars

-A cat in Sri Lanka smuggles drugs and SIM cards into a prison

-We learn about, CIVVL, an Uber-like service for evicting people from their homes during a pandemic for fun and profit

-and, of course, we watch some of the dumbest TikToks you've ever seen!

This week, we're talking about the LatinX-Games! Get your longboard and your cranberry juice and go full TikTok superstar with us. Also on this episode: -David learns about plaque psoriasis in Matt learns what Jeep stands for -Stephen devises a new concept for an Italian coffeehouse -Matt beats David in a rousing game of darts -David hates the smell of the ham plants in Virginia -An Oregon man sets some U-Hauls on fire when he throws a firework at his ex -Ducks decide where to get the best bread and lay the duck D down -Strippers start to deliver food to make extra money in the era of COVID-19 -We discuss how Godfather's PIzza should be considered a crime against humanity, why the Wawa Gobbler is one of the greatest inventions, and bizarre mandatory restaurant greetings -Matt visits his burrito in the intensive care unit and finds out a Taco Bell cashier is feeling more than terrific. -David knows a little too much about "Stand and Deliver" and "Kingpin" -And some women really get into it at a show Stephen is on, but a marriage falls apart at a show David is on.

Get on the Mukbang Bus with us! On this episode: -Stephen isn't a Florida cracker, but a Maryland claw cracker -David and Matt bond over the award winning masterpiece cinema of "Varsity Blues" -We watch a TikTok furniture repair video that gets a little spicy -David introduces a US citizen/third world country exchange program -A Texas boy wins a mullet championship where he competes against freedom flappers, modern mullets, and Tennessee top hats -Stephen is a proud Italian, or at least he used to be -Arnold Schwarzenegger lectures beta soy boys on how they don't properly enjoy their stogies like he does -Nikocado Avocado horrifies us with his McDonald's Mukbang video where he eats over $100 of McTrash -and Rudy Giuliani organizes a grassroots campaign initiative at a landscaping business in Pennsylvania that he mistook for a Four Seasons Hotel.

We're talking about the Gentlemen's C-Word. Which C-word? The answer may shock you! On this episode: Matt Williams drops some Johnny Cash history on us Matt looks like Heat Miser from "A Year without Santa Claus" Amanda the intern learns about biker culture Amanda gets a COVID scare and has to keep her throat coated to avoid catching the corona David Wayne is hopelessly addicted to lozenges and a recreational drop user Amanda pitches her interview show where she talks tennis on the streets Stephen educates us on the only way to play the Soviet anthem David and Matt reminisce fondly over President Obama sinking a 3 in a viral video Amanda teaches us about the "Glizzy Gripper" and David is tired of young folx slang A man in Davie, Florida goes full contact with an adult leopard and gets an earful We remember Sean Connery getting slappy and David doesn't know the difference between Foreigner and the Police.

Are dinosaurs even real? The Fresh Queen of Bad Air doesn't think so! They're just a conspiracy from Big Science. On this week's episode of "How to Die Alone": -Stephen shows off some door handles designed to prevent suicide -We learn about a snack foood where you're supposed to just eat the whole dang bag -Shark Tank goes will for dog toilet paper, Pooch Paper! -We watch a YouTube video about how dinosaurs never existed, but dragons did -Dr. Phil ain't your daddy, and he says so on TikTok -David pitches his new product - Slap in a Box! -We reimagine the Big Mouth Billy Bass with a nu metal soundtrack -David was haunted by his Teddy Ruxpin -Matty wants us to guess how many ceiling fans are in his parents house -and David answers every question anyone's ever had about "Over the Top" with Sylvester Stallone

On this week's episode: -David just wants to tell his story and winds up exhausted -Amanda introduces us to the Florida boot -We celebrate the marriage of airboats and snow -David educates us on Florida's historic logging industry -Stephen watches a true crime series where cameramen follow people committing crimes in real-time -Matt Williams helps someone move, someone who isn't Amanda or Stephen -Matt Carter calls in from the mean streets of Uber Eats -Matt Carter and Stephen Henry do a show where they compete with some playoff sports -The GPS doesn't know where Matt Williams lives -Stephen finds a used car dealership where the vehicles have great gas mileage -Matt Carter gets into a disagreement over graphic design -Matt Carter and David reminisce about being into tuning their Civics -We invent the first masculine hygiene product and discuss amazing inventions by women -We review the hot new board game Ms. Monopoly -Amanda goes all the way off on retractable leashes -Amanda learns Matt Williams about "cuffing season"

On this week's episode of How to Die Alone - Episode 151 - Bundt Cake Baguettes: -We thank our YouTube audience for helping us get our own URL at 100 subscriptions -David tries to wrap his head around sub sandwich rings -Amanda gets out of the basement only to be sent to a resort -Matt Carter prefers drinking while on shrooms -Stephen presents everything you never thought you'd need to know about tanukis -Amanda discovers a new way to store racoons -We get horrified by the Mario for Atari commercial -We clap back at the defenders of the Proud Boys in our comments -We discuss why Milo Yiannopolous didn't get to go to CPAC -Matt Williams pirates a cherished Lee Greenwood anthem -The Matts meet a real life millionaire -We analyze the Kickstarter for the "Really Karen?" board game -David goes off on vegetarians -We review the anti-racist reporting system Yelp implemented -David eats dinner at a segregated restaurant in Indiana -and Amanda and Matt Carter come out against designer dogs

On this week's episode, we're talking about sandal lickers! Also: Matt Williams fights his way through medical school with his emotional support keg Fraternities don't make pizza at all Stephen learns why Jimmy Johns is charging him an extra quarter We have maximum rage over the minimum wage We discuss the Trump poster that supports ALL troops Matt Williams learns a thing or three about personal fitness from old gym rats Stephen explains how old men are able to speak We imagine megachurch pastors like Joel Osteen and the dingus from "The 700 Club" getting even more holy An Irish court determines Subway bread isn't bread Spain declares a food fight with Jamie Oliver Stephen pitches "Encino Man 2" and David pitches his supper into boiling water Bad Bunny and KFC both have some sold out Crocs Matt Carter learns how to spell flibbertigibbets Matt Williams's old neighbors get some brand new yard barges And we lament the loss of the video tape rewinder profession.

On this week's episode of the "How to Die Alone Podcast": -Matt Williams gets day drunk on Vizzy Hard Seltzers for his birthday. -Matt Carter works a show at an event center in Port Richey. -Stephen does a comedy show and notices a mysterious substance on his car. -Matt Williams and Amanda the intern go to a bowling alley, Matt dines on the shrimp, and the bartender refuses to mix them drinks. -David does a commercial for Everest University because he ain't doing nothing! -We fondly remember the "love tester" machine at bowling alleys and bars. -Matty tortures us all with 90s techno. -David reads us an entry from his LiveJournal from 2004. -A local restaurant patron weighs in on getting shorted on meat at a Pollo Tropical. -Amanda shows off a TikTok about a microwave and fruit snacks. -and Machine Gun Kelly says Pete Davidson hooking up with Ariana Grande should give all us other completely average guys hope!