Over It And On With It

Do you know that every challenge you face presents an amazing opportunity for healing and growth? That is why I am so passionate about Expectation Hangovers - because they are doorways to transformation.

We do not want to relate to Expectation Hangovers as victims because it prevents us from leveraging the learnings! Disappointment happens FOR you, not TO you.

Expectation Hangovers teach us:
1. Control is an illusion
2. Our comfort zone is a trap
3. True fulfillment comes from inside
4. The Universe does not punish us

My call with Nadine is about overcoming the Expectation Hangover of a job loss and breakup We explore why we put pressure on ourselves to not make mistakes and how our past is able to influence us even though we may not recognize it.

Remember, if you point your compass towards spirituality and honor your feelings, you can use your soul’s inner wisdom to learn to love and to heal yourself. The door of opportunity exists for you to heal and transform after you experience an Expectation Hangover.

Consider/Ask Yourself:
What am I learning?
What am I healing?
What is my outer experience teaching me about my inner reality?
Can I relate to putting a lot of pressure on myself?
Do I think there is something I need to do to be loved or worthy?
Do I have negative self-talk which perpetuates high expectations of myself?

Nadine’s Question:
In February, Nadine was working her dream job and she had the perfect man. Now four months later, she finds herself in a new job she is not interested in and her man left.

Nadine’s Key Insights and Aha’s:
● She may be looking at herself as a home improvement project
● She engages in negative self-talk
● She has the same relationship over and over again
● Her childhood is not her fault

How to get over it and on with it:
● Ask your inner counselor what am I learning
● Ask yourself “in order to be loved I need to”
● What would you say to yourself as a child?
● Take a deep dive into your spiritual practice

Tools and Takeaways:
● Spend some time single and fall in love with yourself
● Write down “In order to be loved, I need” and then finish the sentence
● Talk to your younger self and reassure them
● Practice self-care by nurturing yourself
● Allow yourself to feel your own emotions with compassion
● Understand you are not broken and become who you truly want to be

Resources:

• Christine Hassler
• @christinhassler
• Expectation Hangover

This call is for all you do-ers and over-achievers out there.

We find ourselves in a time in which we wear our busyness like a badge of honor. We define ourselves by what we do. And when something we define ourselves by, such as a job, goes away we find ourselves with an Expectation Hangover.

An Expectation Hangover is disappointment. It’s when one of three things happen:
1.) Something doesn’t turn out like we planned
2.) Something does turn out like we planned, but we don’t get the feeling we thought we would have
3.) Life just throws us an unexpected curveball

My coaching session with Lisa today uncovers her Expectation Hangover as a huge opportunity for her to just be.

If you would like coaching from me in an upcoming episode, contact me at christinehassler.com

Consider/Ask Yourself:
Can you relate to being busy all the time?
Do you often use busyness as a distraction?
Do you panic during times when you aren’t busy?
Do you have a busy life, but not a fulfilled life?
Is it challenging to receive loving support, including financial support from a family member?
Are you paying attention to all the things which are going right for you when you experience an expectation hangover?

Lisa’s Question:
Lisa feels she has accomplished a great deal this year. She completed her MBA, got married and will soon be moving to a new city. During her job search, she is encountering some rejection and the disappointment that goes along with it.

Lisa’s Key Insights and Aha’s:
● She kept herself busy as a distraction
● She relies on herself too much
● She doesn’t have to handle so many things on her own
● She has her worthiness attached to having a job

How to get over it and on with it:
● Ask yourself what am I learning during this expectation hangover?
● Surround yourself with your soul friends and family
● Give yourself full permission to relax and let go
● Break up with the idea that you are what you do
● Press pause on the goal line and re-orient yourself to the soul line

Tools and Takeaways:
● Give yourself permission to stop chasing results
● Get a copy of Expectation Hangover and work through the exercises and guided meditations
● Ask someone for support
● Take some quiet time for yourself
● Make an agreement with yourself to just be

Resources:

Christine Hassler

We can want to do things in life but just wanting is not enough.  Are you committed to really taking the steps to get there?   Difference makers have commitment and discipline. Passion is not enough. If you feel stuck, invest in yourself, take risks and learn to be comfortable with uncertainty. One thing we need to commit to is shifting our internal states and stories, which means updating our beliefs to get into alignment with what we want. Remember, our outside world is a reflection of our inside world. In this call with Gail, she is at a crossroads when she is thinking of leaving a more analytical job to pursue a more creative path.  She is  getting mixed messages and whether “just follow your passion” is good advice for her to follow. We cover those topics in the call along with a conversation about how her logical mind is an obstacle – and how to make it more of an ally. Please keep your comments and questions coming. It’s so exciting to connect with you.   Consider/Ask Yourself: Does your logical and reasonable mind get in the way of hearing your intuition? Do you think you have to know all the steps of your plan before you can take a step? Are you confused about the messages the universe is sending? Do you feel too “in your head” most of the time? Would you say your inside world is the reflection you want to project to the outside world? Do you feel you are in vibrational alignment with that which you want to attract?    Gail’s Question: Gail recently left her corporate job and wants to move into a more creative role. But she feels like she is getting mixed messages from the universe. She asks for Christine’s insight.   Gail’s Key Insights and Aha’s: ● Gail needs to trust her creative skills ● Her energy shifts when she talks about her desired career ● She needs to satiate her creative hunger ● Understanding she’s on a journey ● She needs to feel the vibration within herself How to get over it and on with it: ● Get in vibrational alignment ● Give yourself permission to explore ● Self-acknowledge and connect yourself to the passion ● Feel into things instead of figuring them out Tools and Takeaways: ● Give yourself permission to pursue something you are passionate about ● Practice vibrational manifesting ● Get in to your creative ● Ask for support along your journey in the form of prayer Resources: Association of Transformational Leaders Christine Hassler

If you’ve ever had challenges with other people in your life, especially parents, you will identify with this episode. On some level, we choose our parents to be our spiritual teachers. Being close becomes complicated as we transition from being a child to being an adult.  Listen in as Jessica is feeling conflicted between wanting to live her own life and wanting her parents approval.   Consider/Ask Yourself: Can you relate to wanting to please people you love? Do you feel obligated to do what your parents want from you? Do you feel guilty if you don’t do what is expected of you?   Jessica’s Question: Jessica’s conservative parents get mad, impose guilt trips and cause her stress when she talks about her boyfriend, who has a daughter. She would like insights on how to hold on to her relationship and respect her parents feelings.   Jessica’s Key Insights and Aha’s: ● It’s her time to have a relationship ● She allows her parents to emotionally manipulate her How to get over it and on with it: ● Be ok with your parents not being ok with your life ● Don’t be ruled by fear ● Take a break - try a 30-day hiatus ● Be clear about what you are willing to do for relationships ● Send your parents love and light ● Take responsibility for your own inner experience Tools and Takeaways: ● Keep a picture of your loved ones and send them love and light every day ● During meditation have your higher-self speak with their higher-self ● Keep choosing love Resources: Christine Hassler @christinhassler

I know an area many of you dream about has to do with your finding your purpose and serving others.  You may also long for more freedom. Freedom not only to do something you love, but also have the money and time to spend more time with people you love.  This is the dream of today’s caller, Mike.   . His constant search of products and materials lead him to believe his next steps need to come from outside himself. We discuss how he may be stalling by continuing to do research instead of listening to his internal inspiration and moving forward.  I help Mike realize what his dream truly may be . . . . Often when we feel dreams and longings in our hearts as part psychic ability we all have. We somehow know fulfillment is coming, like a premonition. We just don’t know when. And, even though we may want it now our dreams take time to evolve.   Consider/Ask Yourself: What heartfelt dreams are calling you forward? Do you have a sense of what you want to do but not taking action? Do you start many things but not follow through? Are you waiting for some kind of answer or sign from the universe? Are you stalling and calling it research?   Caller’s Question: Mike, a self-proclaimed product junkie, has a dream of having a home based business.  He lacks confidence in his decision-making process and would like to break his cycle of never moving forward. Key Insights and Aha’s: ● Mike could be the product and sell himself ● He could inspire other people ● He should let his inspiration drive his next steps How to get over it and on with it: ● Ask yourself the question as if it was someone else coming to you for guidance ● Don’t let your head get in the way ● Let God use you as an instrument ● Meditate and recognize your unique gifts ● Start with the big vision and work backwards Tools and Takeaways: ● Write a life experience resume ● Re-orient towards an internal direction, try it for 30 days ●Answer these questions: Who am I here to serve What can I offer How can I deliver it Resources: Christine Hassler Secret Sauce Mastermind [email protected]  

When Eileen called she said she wanted to move past the breakup of a 3-year relationship. The relationship ended abruptly and she was still searching for closure from the other person. Knowing the purpose of any relationship is for healing and growth, and not happily ever after, we worked through the issue based relationship Eileen had and what the relationship may have taught her about herself. Listen in as Eileen discovers herself in the present and works to nurture her inside reality. Consider/Ask Yourself:

Are there any unresolved hurts from previous relationships you are carrying around?

Can you see how you have drawn romantic relationships in to help fill a void?

Do you feel like you can’t move forward in life because you are stuck in the past? Eileen’s Question:

Eileen is ready to move on from a past relationship but doesn’t know what steps to take. She also is seeking closure with the other person, she didn’t feel she received when the relationship ended abruptly. Eileen’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

● She doesn’t trust herself with making decisions

● Certain qualities eroded during her relationship

● She felt somewhat addicted to the relationship

● Her past life includes a pattern of chasing love

How to get over it and on with it:

● Recognize your soul is ready to heal past issues

● Let go of any belief that the relationship could have worked out

● Reassure your younger self there is nothing she has to do to earn love

● Never underestimate the power of doing the invisible, internal things Tools and Takeaways:

● Write a letter and start with Dear Name,

 ○ I’m saying goodbye because ...

 ○ I learned ...

 ○ I forgive you for ...

 ○ I forgive myself for ...

 ○ Thank you for ...

● Write a letter to reassure your younger self

● Commit to 40 days of connection/forgiveness work

● Acknowledging your growth and your blessings   Resources: Christine Hassler @christinhassler

Welcome to my first official episode. I went through 25 different coaching sessions in preparation for this show and trying to decide which one would be first was difficult because all my callers were amazing. I ended up choosing Anneke’s call because we get into the question “Who am I?” and because of the level of vulnerability in this session. We often feel embarrassed and apologize for our emotions, but I think of vulnerability as strength. Remember, we get to choose who we are and not being who we are can be suffocating.  We are not defined by other people’s views of us. We are all born with natural gifts from the divine. It’s up to us to embrace them and use them.   Consider/Ask Yourself:

Who am I?

Do you feel like you are really living authentically?

Are you fully expressing who you are or are you being a version of yourself?

Do you struggle with loneliness?

Are you in touch with your emotions?

Are you concerned about what other people think of you? Anneke’s Question: Anneke is about to make a big career change and would like to know how to be open and honest about who she really is and to shift from her pattern of keeping herself small and not seen. Anneke’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

● Acknowledging she sugarcoats her difficult emotions.

● She doesn’t want to be a burden on others.

● Loneliness is has been her friend because it’s when she gives herself a break.

● It’s ok for other people not to like it when she is her authentic self.

● Recognizing she is staying in her comfort zone because those emotions are familiar. How to get over it and on with it:

● Try taking actions to trust yourself and be consistently authentic.

● Don’t compare yourself to other people, embrace your own essence.

● Be willing to remember the essence of who you truly are.

● Invite spirit into your space.

● Practice self-forgiveness.

● Don’t be defined by what other people have told you about you. Tools and Takeaways:

● Write out who you are, what is your unique essence? Then, for 30 days get in front of a mirror and make “I am” statements with your answers.

● Pick 2-3 people to practice intimacy and authenticity with.

● Write this sentence “Sometimes I pretend I am (fill in the blank) but I am not”.

● Write a thank you letter to loneliness for giving you time alone. Resources: Light Worker Workshop Expectation Hangover Christine Hassler Coaching

Hello and welcome to my introductory podcast. This podcast is fulfilling a dream I had as a little girl. Ever since listening to Dr. Laura Schlessinger on the radio, I have wanted to have a call-in advice show. I loved to hear people gaining insight and having aha moments on the radio in just 5-10 minutes. This show will be a mix of practical and spiritual information to help callers (and the rest of us by default) break free from suffering and disappointment. I’ll be talking a lot about “Expectation Hangovers” which was the tile of my last book.  If you are new to my work you are probably wondering, just what is an expectation hangover? An expectation hangover is when things don’t go according to plan, when we don’t get the sense of fulfillment after something does happen or when life throws us a total curveball. To get our friendship started, I am sharing my story with you and sharing the moment I had of peace and connection. It only lasted a second, but its effects will last a lifetime. I welcome you to shift your consciousness, to heal your mind and ease your transitions. Consider/Ask Yourself:

Who am I?

What do I want and how do I get it?

What makes time stop for me?

What am I learning?

What’s here for me to heal? Key Insights and Aha’s:

● Visualization through meditation told me to serve more. This podcast gave me the outlet.

● When you listen to someone else being coached your defenses are down allowing you to take in the information more freely.

● Self-imposed shame and judgments can stunt our growth. How to get over it and on with it:

● Milk it for all that it’s worth.

● Recognize that even the things which feel miserable are in service to our growth learning and healing.

● Understand your suffering could be the catalyst for your passion. Tools and Takeaways:

● 5 Key Valuable Lessons of Expectation Hangovers

○ They illuminate that we all put a lot of expectation on ourselves.

○ They teach us we don’t have control.

○ They push us out of our comfort zone.

○ They teach us to live inside out instead of outside in.

○ They teach us to move out of the victim mentality.   Resources Mentioned: Christine Hassler @christinhassler #overitandonwithit Expectation Hangover 20-Something, 20-Everything