Heart Healing from Loss

Piles of pictures, newspaper cuttings, postcards, silverware, a doll collection or stamps or coins.... All of these can end up in your home after a loved one passes.

But you don't collect stamps, and the silverware will likely never get used. So what do you do with the items an important person in your life has left behind? Shove them in the attic and make them the next generation's problem? Feel guilt over your neglect of those photo albums full of people you don't know?

Or do you figure out how to deal with it in a way that frees up your space AND honors the person they belonged to?

Katrina Hamilton helps people work through their "grief clutter." It is, after all, your relationship with the person that matters; not your relationship with their high school yearbooks. 

Listen to Wendy Sloneker, Advanced Grief Recovery Specialist, and Katrina Hamilton, owner of Katrina Consults, talk through how we can be burdened by objects that aren't our own. And how we can find our way out from under all that stuff.

Aging is tough; watching a parent get older and knowing how and when to help can be nearly as challenging.

There is a possibility of grief, anger, misunderstanding, and family conflict all through the process, so how do you make sure you're working through it as healthfully as possible? How do you make sure your parent is receiving the necessary help to deal with losing independence, health, strength, their own home, and so on?

One way to keep challenges manageable is to start preparing now, says Patricia Throop, owner of Eldercare Consulting LLC. Start talking about arrangements: What happens when they can no longer safely drive? When it's time for them to have more care, where will they live? 

In this podcast, Grief Recovery Specialist Wendy Sloneker talks with Patricia Throop about all the ways families can prepare in advance so everyone is comfortable with how things will proceed later.

If you have or will have family who need your help as they age, you can get help and advice from Patricia Throop. Find her at EldercareNW.com.

You can learn more about Wendy and how she can help you navigate grief at her website, HeartHealingFromLoss.com.

The body knows. The things you may have pushed from your consciousness, the things you've dampened down, the things you've ignored, sometimes for years or even decades -- the body has its own memory, and it doesn't forget.

In this episode of Heart Healing from Loss, Chad Kelderman of SOMA Bodywork talks with Grief Recovery expert Wendy Sloneker about how the body holds grief, even grief you may think you put behind you.

We know that touch can release deep emotions: think of the power of a hug on a bad day, or a high five in celebration, a kiss, an arm around the shoulders. Now imagine the healing power of touch and manipulation by someone who understands that connection.

Do your joints burn? Is your chest tight? Do your neck and shoulders just ache? Of course there can be physical reasons for all these feelings, but discounting the emotional causes can mean locking yourself in for suffering physical and emotional pain longer than you should. 

Have a listen to the episode, then find relief with Chad Kelderman at SOMABodywork.net and Wendy Sloneker at HeartHealingFromLoss.com. 

We don't talk about grief and loss. We might be willing to grumble about a lost cell phone or wallet, but when it comes to the kind of loss Grief Recovery expert Wendy Sloneker means, well, we'd rather not think about it, thanks very much.

Nikole Stanfield has experienced loss in her life. The loss wasn't "recent," but it was still painful. And, she realized, unresolved grief was holding her back from fully experiencing life and feeling empowered to meet the next loss event life might hand her.

So she went through Wendy's program and developed tools that help her deal with losses present, past, and future. If you're ready to move beyond a loss, whether that's a loved one who has died, loss of a job, loss of a friend, loss of a marriage, you owe it to yourself to find a way past it.

Be sure to look into Wendy's program and all the ways she can help you at WendySloneker.com. 

Yes, it's 2020 and time has moved on, but have you?

Grief doesn't end according to arbitrary human markers like New Year's Eve, and if you're not quite recovered from 2020 yet, that's OK.

Acknowledging that you're still dealing with residual effects - big or small - is part of the healing process.

In this episode, Wendy checks in with us to see how we're doing as 2020 rolls up and 2021 rolls on.

So... how are you?

Also, don't forget to check Wendy's website to find out about courses in helping children with grief. If you have kids in your life who could use some adult help to recover from loss, be sure to check out the calendar and register. 

If you're enjoying the Heart Healing from Loss podcast, please subscribe, rate, review, and share so others can find this resource more easily. 

We all grieve differently, but the only truly wrong way to grieve is to try and shortcut the process.

Culturally, we are taught that there's a "right" way, and that for grown ups, we should probably do it quietly, with dignity, and preferably quickly.

But can grief -- for whatever reason we're experiencing it -- be dealt with so quickly? Or do we suffer if the healing is rushed or incomplete?

In this podcast, Advanced Grief Specialist Wendy Sloneker talks with Life and Relationship Coach Kathy Clayton about how knowing yourself and your needs and respecting those needs will allow for a healthier grief process.

You wouldn't think moving to a new home would "qualify" as a grief event, but it really does make sense.

You're leaving behind a space that was yours for a while, where important things happened. Maybe there's a nook where you liked to read, or a growth chart that marks the major changes of childhood to adulthood, or maybe a beloved pet left a scratch on the wall that you just couldn't bring yourself to paint over.

Buying a new home can have significant emotional ups and downs, too: if you live where houses go fast, you can lose the bid over and over until you're reluctant to ever get excited about a prospective home again. 

And kids can have their own challenges — losing their yard, their school, their friends can all bring their own flavor of grief. We don't talk about it because we think we're not supposed to feel grief in an exciting time, but that doesn't mean the loss isn't there.

In this episode Advanced Grief Recovery Specialist Wendy Sloneker talks with realtor Ericka Hardwick about the ways grief can come up, and some creative ways both have seen people manage it.

Find more about Wendy at wendysloneker.com
Find more about Ericka at erickahardwick.com or lambandcompany.com/realtors/ericka-hardwick/ and check out the growth chart ideas: https://pin.it/2Da8yKk

Like learning CPR or how to use a fire extinguisher, maybe it's best to learn how to deal with grief BEFORE it happens?

Nikole Stanfield hasn't really worked through the grief from her grandmother's passing three years ago. And with the loss of a close friendship, the grief was compounded. She decided to be proactive and learn the skills she needed to manage grief while she was in a good position to take on the task.

With guidance from Grief Recovery Specialist and End-of-Life Doula Wendy Sloneker, Nikole is looking forward to healing from her loss.

The holidays look great ... on paper. And they can be a truly wonderful time. But they can also be a time of pressure and stress, and if you're grieving, you really may not be feeling festive.

Wendy Sloneker, Advanced Grief Recovery Specialist and end-of-life Doula, has some great ideas on giving yourself grace at this time of year. How do you gauge your actual desire to attend that Zoom party? What do you do if sitting and staring out a window is all you can bring yourself to do?

If those questions are haunting your holidays, tune in and get some answers.

The holidays are fast approaching, and while it can be a wonderful time full of family and fun, it can also be a challenging time. With the holidays comes holiday food, and with it all the stress, guilt, and resentment.

For many, holidays are also times of sadness — and with COVID limiting our ability to gather with family and friends and enjoy our usual traditions, many more are experiencing some grief this year. When we feel sad and stressed, one of our major comforts can be ... food.

If you're feeling challenged to stay healthy and make good choices for your body and spirit, Holistic Health Coach Catherine Dickson can help. In this podcast, Wendy and Catherine talk about how intimately entwined food is with the holidays and with grief, and how we can learn to enjoy food, enjoy the holidays, honor those things that we're feeling sad about, while still making the right choices.

Catherine Dickson is an Integrative Nutrition Health Coach and Certified Personal Trainer who teaches women how to break free from their food and body image issues, so they reclaim their health and enjoy more freedom and fun in life. Catherine leads a virtual group coaching program, called The Food Freedom Method, and also hosts cooking classes twice a month on Zoom! Learn more about her at riseholistichealth.com or on Instagram @theholisticbiscuit.