Mindful Moments with David Larbi

Another Q&A Episode, as is tradition every tenth episode! As ever, I chose the questions that I feel best positioned to answer according to life right now - I hope my answers are well-received and of value. As ever, thank you for being here and thank you for listening. Here’s to the next ten episodes!

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When it comes to tackling tasks I know will likely bring discomfort, I can find it difficult to get out of my head and into gear. Sometimes, though, that’s all that’s left to do. We can only think so much before doing, and sometimes difficulty is far greater in the hypothesis than in reality. It’s up to me to act, then deal with any difficulties as they arise rather than letting hypothetical difficulty stop me from acting. Make it real, then deal!

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When encountering familiar difficulties which we’ve overcome before, it can feel frustrating that we’re finding the same things difficult once more. It causes me to question my own growth and progress. Some things, however, are simply difficult in nature. To struggle with the same things does not mean we haven’t grown, it’s simply indicative of life’s changing nature. We can find the same things difficult, but deal with them better than we ever would have before.

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Sometimes, good things come to an end. Things being fleeting can make them precious; good things don’t have to last forever for them to have the impact they need to. They still resonate into the future, and are always worth experiencing even if they don’t last as long as we hoped.

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I’ve been making a conscious effort to occupy my time wisely. If I’m not careful, I give in to my need to constantly feel as though I’m actively working hard and doing something all the time - in other words, sometimes I busy myself needlessly. Being more intentional about my time is much better for my health, and something I am doing my best not to compromise on.

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When things are difficult, I think about quitting. It’s a logical thought process, and one I no longer take any shame in. To understand and explore my desire to quit is to give my feelings credibility and make a decision I can truly stand behind, and continuing when I know I could have given up is when I see how strong I can be. 

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The thought, “I can’t be bothered to do this” happens at the time when I could, in fact, conveniently do this - I just don’t feel like it. Getting over that feeling and deciding more often to think “might as well” and do it, is something I never regret. It’s not the biggest deal in the world, but the more I decide “might as well”, the better my life is in the small ways that add up.

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I’ve been working for a long time, years, on being consistent in many areas of my life. I’m in a place now where I can see progress even as I look to improve, which feels really nice. Building consistency isn’t easy but the principles are simple, and it’s something we can all do!

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When I mess up, I find it hard to forgive myself and let go. The problem with this is it that I then miss the opportunity to be present, understand my actions, move forward and heal. Forgiving myself is a practice I am working hard on.

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If I’m not careful, I find it all too easy to equate my self-worth to how productive I’m being and what I’m achieving at the present time. Building better self-esteem comes from understanding that I have value no matter what I’m currently achieving, and productivity and achievement are useful but should not be my only validation.

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