Tell Me About Your Mother

Evan and Melissa answer an audience question regarding intellectual defenses in session. "How do I get my therapist to become aware that I am using my intellect to deflect from emotional vulnerability in our sessions?"

We are hoping to incorporate this type of interaction with followers more often. If you have any questions about therapy, please don't hesitate to reach out!

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Evan and Melissa explore how intellectualizing stories serves as a protective distancing from emotional exploration, expression, and healing.

• Implicit memory healing
• Bilateral stimulation
• CBT often ineffective for treating
• Bottom up approach to client care versus top down approach
• Emotional-relational realm being the healing quality of therapy

Evan and Melissa explore the ways in which clients use intellectualism as a means to conceptualize emotional memories to maintain safety. Topics also include:

• Emotional attainment
• Maintaining an observer role when someone is dysregulated
• Maladaptive ways of creating self-protection
• Therapy is not advice-giving
• Explore emotional memories is delicate and is a process

Evan, Melissa, and Eli share their experiences with client attunement and the ways in which such connection can promote a deep sense of understanding and meaning.

• Emotional attunement with clients informing unconventional approaches
• Eli sifts through his transcription grad school notes from 1913
• Emotional attunement compared to flocks of birds and musicians
• Intuition informing therapeutic path

Evan, Melissa, and Eli process Evan's recent experience being harassed by the police. Topics also include:

• Profiling
• Crime and punishment ideology
• Life-long record keeping
• Escalation before de-escalation
• Cop incompetence

Evan and Eli meet in video form for the first time-- available on Youtube! They use this hour to explore themes of:

• Conversion Therapy
• Emotional Residue from clients
• Counter-transferrence

• Parentified child impact in romantic relationships
• Cultural differences fueling assumptions in friendship
• DOS OS
• How the dating sphere has changed with technology
• You watched too many Disney movies
• Culture of immediacy impeded on natural romantic development
• The romantic spark is bullshit
• Dopamine dating
• Are we marketing authenticity?
• Compatibility is found through mutual authentic marketing
• Caretaking others reflects fear of rejection as opposed to caring for others
• Evan’s soapbox grow up stop attaching previous relationship experiences
• Dating isn’t easy for men either
• New generation perceived pursuit as predatory
• Evan shares his hinge profile with Eli and Melissa

Evan and Eli join for another episode to explore how therapists can unintentionally assume understanding of clients' stories based on personal bias. They then explore the evolution of porn and its possible future implications on sexuality, dating, and identity.

• Only fans
• AI becoming a sexual sphere
• Sex dolls
• Specifically identifying the core
• When we feel stuck
• Men being “too nice” ripple of toxic masculinity

Evan, Meliisa, and Eli explore the a case that Melissa is processing.

• A great resource from Dr. Nicole LePera helps us get started
• Parentified child case study
• How are crises adaptive systemically?
• Reenactment between parent, peers, and therapist
• Caretaking to avoid self care
• Emphasizing choice with client archetypes that exhibit signs of learned helplessness
• "Mom anchors"-- a client's unintentional confession

Evan, Melissa, and Eli discuss the intention of the podcast and ways to become more intentional in our discussions.

• Melissa is our podcast mommy
• Incorporating the interpersonal supervision model into our conversations
• Chasing trends creates pop psychology and misinformation
• The power of Free Association