Raising Mothers of Teens

Two words “teen years!”  For some of you these words may bring up feelings of stress and anxiety because you have heard how difficult the teen years can be.  Maybe you are in the thick of the “teen years” feeling disconnected as if you and your child are living on different planets.  The words “teen years” may bring up sadness because you feel like you are loosing your baby.  You may find yourself dreaming of the days when your child was little and looked at you with adoring eyes never wanting to leave your side.  I get it!

There comes a time where when our kids become pre teens and teens who start wanting their own space and independence.  All to often as parents we take that change so personal, as if it was a direct reflection of how our kids feel about us.  

Here is the deal the teen years don’t have to be difficult, in fact it can be an absolutely beautiful season providing you with an opportunity to grow personally, create a deeper connection with your child and build healthy communication.  

Come hang out with me and I will share with you how spending intentional time building deep connection and strong communication will allow you and your teen to sail through the adolescent years and have a solid relationship.  

Book Resource:

Brainstorm The Power and Purpose of The Teenage Brain by Daniel J. Siegel, MD

Have you ever emotionally reacted to your child and afterwards thought where in the world did that come from?

As Maya Angelou would say, “Do the best you can until you know better.  Then when you know better do better.”

Our mind is the most powerful tool we have and can be our best friend once we understand how it works and take action cleaning up and replacing the old programs.

Dr. Joe Dispenza says, “We cannot create a new future by holding onto the emotions of the past.”

Come hang out with me sis and I will share with you:

WHY you emotionally react without even thinking.

WHAT you can do to stop the emotional reaction.

HOW you can replace it with a healthy peaceful response.

Motherhood is like taking a road trip.  However most of us have never really taken the time to sit down to put together a thought out plan backed by research, recommendations and wisdom from those that have already gone on the motherhood trip or are a few steps ahead of us.

Here's the deal, if we don’t have a clear direction as to where we were going chances are we may end up getting lost or going going down a road we never intended to go down.  

Lets hang out and I'll share with you why taking the time to plan out and study your road map to mother hood will save you from visiting undesirable places and going down dangerous roads.

Resilience.  We have all heard this word but do you know what the true definition of resilience is?

Resilience:  The capacity to recover quickly from difficulties; toughness.

Psychological resilience:  Psychological resilience is the ability to mentally or emotionally cope with a crisis or to return to pre-crisis status quickly. Resilience exists when the person uses "mental processes and behaviors in promoting personal assets and protecting self from the potential negative effects of stressors". 

So what does it take to be resilient?  What tools do you need to have in order to build up your resiliency muscles?  Why is being resilient a game changer?

What if we used hard times to launch us into a whole other dimension of resilience?  

What if we:

• Didn't allow the hard times to paralyze us and keep us stuck. 
• Choose to look at hard times as an opportunity for growth?  An opportunity to strengthen our resiliency muscle?
• Focus on the things we can change and accept what we can’t?
• Acknowledge the negative but choose to tune into the good?

Reference Resources:

Three secrets of resilient people (Lucy Hone):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NWH8N-BvhAw

Charles Hunt:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3qELiw_1Ddg

The Art of Failing Forward | Sasha Shillcutt, MD, MS, FASE

November is the month we celebrate Thanksgiving.  You may have a tradition where you go around the table and say what you are grateful for.  Creating space throughout your day every day to express thankfulness is something you can implement all year round!  I literally could not be more excited to have a very special guest on this episode to talk about all things GRATITUDE!  Justine Wheeler is a walking light of gratitude, wise beyond her years and her daily gratitude practice is an inspiration!  Annnnndddd I cant forget to mention that she is my sissy, I am so thrilled to share her light with all of you!

In this episode Justine and I talk about the importance of gratidtude, why it is so beneficial to your overall well being, how you can implement it into your own life and how your whole family can get into the habit of gratitude.

Connect with Justine Wheeler:

Instagram @thegoodguidehq

Link to gratitude research studies:

https://www.happierhuman.com/the-science-of-gratitude/ 

In this episode we talk about how we can prevent “should-ing” on our kids, ourselves and others by taking the word “should” out of our vocabulary.  The word “should” is used when we have an expectation.  Expectations are created because of certain stories and beliefs we have around how things or people “should” be.  Placing unwanted expectations and “should-ing” on ourselves and others creates disconnection and disharmony.  Come hang out as I share how you can kick “should” to the curb creating space for connection, flow, harmony and rhythm in you and your relationships.

What if I told you it’s not possible for your child to trigger you.  Is there such thing as triggers?  Can somebody really cause you to be triggered?  In this episode we dive into triggers!  Come hang out with me as we explore why you get triggered and who causes you to be triggered.  When you change your mindset and perspective around the word “trigger” and who cause you to be “triggered” the relationship you have with yourself and your children will dramatically change.  Where there is change there is FREEDOM!  Lets do this sis!

Resources:

• The Awakened Family By Dr. Shefali Tsabary

This episode is part 2 to season 3 episode 6 titled Dyslexia Awareness.  I believe we can be the best advocate and parent for our chid when we are educated, have empathy and parent consciously.  There is a quote by Brené Brown that I love.

“Empathy has no script.  There is no right way or wrong way to do it.  It’s simply listening, holding space, withholding judgement, emotionally connecting, and communicating that incredibly healing message of, ‘you are not alone.’ ”  Brené Brown

I am so excited to have Michele Barnett back with us for this episode.  Michele is driven to help families and schools understand both the advantages and challenges that dyslexia creates, and to implement practical plans that empower dyslexic students to excel.  Michele is a Dyslexia Screener and Consultant, a Dyslexia Advocate and a Certified Barton Reading & Spelling private tutor.  She serves on the Board of Directors for the International Dyslexia Association - Oregon Branch. Michele is also a Decoding Dyslexia Ambassador and the Co-Founder of the Lake Oswego Parent Dyslexia Community.  She holds an MBA from St. Mary’s College, and a BA from Cornell University with a major in Psychology. Michele and her husband, Berkeley, are the proud parents of two teenage daughters.

In this episode:

• Bring awareness to what a dyslexic child goes through emotionally.
• Shed light on how parents can consciously be in the present moment with their child being attuned to what it is they need.
• Debunk myths around dyslexia and dyslexic children.
• Reassure you that you are not alone.

Dyslexia Simulations Resources:

• Round Robin Reading Dyslexia Simulation:  https://youtu.be/vNwuXbmXOtY
• Writing with Dyslexia Simulation:  https://youtu.be/ZznFCz6V1cM
• Taking Notes with Dyslexia Simulation:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EOtCRGivvCU
• Simulation of the Overall Classroom Experience for students with learning differences:  https://youtu.be/Q3UNdbxk3xs

The month of October is dyslexia awareness month.  This month in particular is close to my heart because our family has been blessed with a child who is dyslexic.  My intention for this episode is to:

• Bring awareness to what dyslexia is.
• Educate you as a parent on what signs to look for.
• Give you tools on how to be the best advocate for you child.
• Shed light on how to be the parent your child needs.
• Show you how to create peace within the home.  

I could not think of a more perfect guest to help me spread awareness and light around dyslexia then Michele Barnett. 

Michele is driven to help families and schools understand both the advantages and challenges that dyslexia creates, and to implement practical plans that empower dyslexic students to excel.  Michele is a Dyslexia Screener and Consultant, a Dyslexia Advocate and a Certified Barton Reading & Spelling private  tutor.  She serves on the Board of Directors for the International Dyslexia Association - Oregon Branch. Michele is also a Decoding Dyslexia Ambassador and the Co-Founder of the Lake Oswego Parent Dyslexia Community.  Prior to her focus on dyslexia, Michele’s background includes over 20 years in consultative sales and client management in the healthcare industry with Blue Shield, Kaiser Permanente, and Cigna. She was an award-winning account executive, and led national product development initiatives. She holds an MBA from St. Mary’s College, and a BA from Cornell University with a major in Psychology. Michele and her husband, Berkeley, are the proud parents of two teenage daughters, and reside in Lake Oswego, Oregon.

Lets dive in!

Recommended Dyslexia Book Resource:

• Dyslexia Empowerment Plan by Ben Foss

Recommended Dyslexia Website Resources:

• https://www.dys-add.com
• http://www.decodingdyslexiaor.org
• http://headstrongnation.org
• https://dyslexiaida.org
• https://or.dyslexiaida.org
• https://dyslexiaida.org/in-your-area-with-global-partners/
• https://www.ncld.org
• https://www.wrightslaw.com

The year 2020 has been full of surprises and plot twists.  We have all had to adjust and re-adjust as things change daily, sometimes moment by moment.   I was doing a study on grief when it hit me, in this season there isn’t a single person on the planet who hasn’t dealt with some type of grief or loss.  In the world of parenthood, both parent and child are experiencing grief/loss.  Grieving what used to be, grieving the way things used to be done, grieving the lack of team sports, grieving the amount of time spent with friends, a loss of the idea of how things should be, the loss of what "normal" is.  We have all gone from the known to unknown and are being stretched far beyond our comfort zones.

Grief is often expressed differently by each individual and can be shown through many different behaviors.  In this episode I share six things you can do as a parent to help your child not only through this season but through the season of life.

Resources:  www.upworthy.com/