The Innovative Therapist

Episode 84. Karen was spiraling. She had been doing so well. She was eating well, walking daily and feeling great. But for some reason today she felt off. She ate more than usual at lunch, maybe because she was scrolling mindlessly on her phone and saw a few upsetting posts about someone she went to high school with who is battling cancer. She kept scrolling, and before she knew it, she had eaten too much. She felt stuffed. Not super stuffed, but enough to feel uncomfortable. She got mildly frustrated with herself after this, but doesn't totally spiral out... yet. She told herself, (somewhat subconsciously), "it's fine, it's one meal, you can get back on track immediately. Relax." But she moves on with her day and doesn't acknowledge the actual thoughts that were going through her mind in the moment. Partly, because she's ashamed of them. She shouldn't feel so self-critical and she knows it isn't helpful. She needs to be kinder to herself, she knows this. She just tries to think of something else instead. If she were really honest with herself, that simple act of eating more at lunch and feeling overfull triggered thoughts like: "I can't believe you did that, you feel sick now, that's what you get." "You were feeling so good, and now you're going to fall back in old habits." And if we dig to the core thought, it was: "You're going to fail again." She continued to feel off all day, and before she knew it she had an extra snack in the afternoon even though she definitely wasn't hungry. By the time dinner came, she felt tired (physically and emotionally), mad at herself, and it was all she could do to heat up leftovers and have dinner in front of the TV. And why not pull out the ice cream, she clearly blew it for the day. All because she didn't fully address what we really bothering her. That hidden sentence that popped up right after she ate a bit extra at lunch. Ready to Stop Going it Alone? One of my biggest regrets in life is not seeking good therapy sooner. You deserve to feel truly guided on your relationship with food and your body. MindBodyHealth is an incredible practice led by my great friend and colleague Dr. Sapna Dosh. This wonderful group of psychologists and dietitians provide evidence-based therapy in person in Washington DC and Arlington VA, and via teletherapy in over 30 states across the United States. Go to MindBodyVA.com to set up your free consultation call and get matched with an excellent and totally vetted therapist today! Be sure to let them know the Motivation Made Easy podcast sent you. Your future self will thank you. How Our Hidden Sentences Hold Us Back You see, our brains avoid the truth of what we are really saying to ourselves about our eating, because it's painful. And a big part of us knows that that inner critic in us can be incredibly unhelpful. Karen's logical attempts to reassure herself were well intentioned. But her brain was still triggered by all the hidden critical thoughts she wasn't acknowledging. The ones exacerbating the pain and silently keeping us stuck. The Power of Mindset Most of us have many unhelpful hidden sentences all the time. And until we learn to unpack them and really examine them, and even look for the positive intention behind that part of us, they will continue to silently impact us, without our control. Confession: I Used to Hate CBT I have a confession to make. I used to really hate mindset work (aka cognitive behavioral therapy or CBT, in grad school). Even still the term mindset kind of annoys me, because it makes me think about all the things I learned that felt so invalidating. Like, just notice you are doing "all or nothing thinking" and shift it. It's that simple, right? Wrong. I had so much unaddressed pain that felt unseen. Changing my mindset in that way felt completely impossible to me. I just wanted to yell, "It isn't that simple!

Episode 83. We talk a lot on this podcast about the harmful ways weight is discussed in medical settings. But what about the harm that's caused when weight isn't discussed at all? I sat down with Dr. Emily Cordes, DO to have this important conversation. Dr. Cordes was trained in a traditional medical setting as a primary care physician. However, she quickly realized that this path wasn't giving her what she needed as a professional. And she learned this, partly because she realized she wasn't getting what she needed as an individual. Tune in to this great conversation all about how to understand the field of medicine and feel empowered to get your needs met within it. We cover a lot in this conversation including: How Emily went from conventional medical training to functional medicine (and why) Weight is seen in medical training as a risk factor and why it isn't as emotionally charged as it is in our culture as a whole How training in a culture of body positivity and inclusivity has impacted younger physicians How traditional conversations makes it almost impossible to address weight related concerns in an effective way Why many physicians opt out of the weight conversation entirely, and how that can do a big disservice What she recommends in terms of making sure root causes are not missed and having respectful conversations about weight I realized that what medicine could offer me personally, wasn't going to get me out of the way I felt. Dr. Emily Cordes, DO Ready to Stop Going it Alone? One of my biggest regrets in life is not seeking good therapy sooner. You deserve to feel truly guided on your relationship with food and your body. MindBodyHealth is an incredible practice led by my great friend and colleague Dr. Sapna Dosh. This wonderful group of psychologists and dietitians provide evidence-based therapy in person in Washington DC and Arlington VA, and via teletherapy in over 30 states across the United States. Go to MindBodyVA.com to set up your free consultation call and get matched with an excellent and totally vetted therapist today! Be sure to let them know the Motivation Made Easy podcast sent you. Your future self will thank you. Support Local Bookstores Near You! Did you know that that if nothing slows their momentum, Amazon will have almost 80% of the book market by the end of 2025? Look, I love the convenience of Amazon, but I’ve got a super cool way that you can support local bookstores and my blog and podcast simply by buying books like you already do! You can choose any bookstore on the list in the US (they plan to expand to other counties in the future) OR you can just let the donation get split between all stores. They have raised over 15 million dollars for local bookstores. On my bookshop, you will see my absolute favorite books related to health and wellness, courage and vulnerability, and even my favorite fiction and kids books! My recent favorite related to achieving a deeper level of healing is No Bad Parts: Healing Trauma and Restoring Wholeness with the Internal Family Systems Model. This book and model of therapy has been very helpful to me personally and I'm also using it with clients and seeing great results. So if you believe in supporting local businesses and want to support m blog and podcast, please consider buying your books through Bookshop from now on! The Psychology of Wellness Bookshop Link. Disclaimer: This blog and podcast is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not a substitute for individual professional advice or treatment, including medical or mental health advice. It does not constitute a provider patient relationship. Disclosure: Using the Bookshop.org links in this post means that I would get an affiliate fee if you purchase from the online bookshop (this supports my business, and local bookstores too!).

Episode 82. A common question I get from people considering weight loss surgery is "will bariatric surgery help with binge eating?", or "can I actually practice intuitive eating or a non-diet approach to eating after surgery"? or "How can I try to get rid of diet mentality if I have to follow a specific diet?" These are excellent questions and today you will get all my thoughts on these topics. Not interested in learning about weight loss surgery? Totally cool. However, you might want to stay tuned because a lot of this topic will still apply to you. The second question is actually relevant regardless of whether you have weight loss surgery, or, have another medical condition were a specific eating pattern is recommended (e.g., avoiding gluten for those with Celiac disease, minimizing dairy for those who have a degree of lactose intolerance, or reducing intake of animal protein for those who have heart disease or want to protect animal rights). What to Expect In This Episode The most common questions I get about bariatric (aka weight loss surgery) and intuitive eating What the research says about weight loss surgery and intuitive eating How autonomous motivation fits into all of this What you need to know if you or someone you love has had surgery or is considering it Ready to Break the Binge Eating Cycle for Good? Ready to stop avoiding and break the binge eating cycle for good? The first step is to disrupt the cycle. My free practical guide has 23 positive ideas for things to do instead of eating. Don't worry, you wont find the standard diet culture BS advice (take a walk, have some water!) Take the first step to finally stop binge eating and grab my free practical guide today! Grab my free guide to disrupt the cycle of emotional and binge eating today! Weight Loss Surgery & Intuitive Eating - Can They Be Friends? At first glance, these fields may seem like complete opposites. How on earth can you "reject the diet mentality" and still pursue a surgery that requires a specific diet and imposes long-term limitations (often) on what it's recommended that you eat, and the amount that feels comfortable to eat with your post-surgical stomach? I get the confusion. And frankly, this topic is controversial and not everyone will agree with me on this. That said, I definitely do think that you can learn or re-learn to be an intuitive eater before or after having bariatric surgery. In fact, our conversation just last episode with Amy Braden is living proof of this. To check on this, let's review the 10 principles of Intuitive Eating. Reject the diet mentality. Honor your hunger. Make peace with food - including unconditional permission to eat. Challenge the food police. Discover the satisfaction factor. Feel your fullness. Cope with your emotions with kindness. Respect your body. Movement - feel the difference. Honor your health - gentle nutrition. Easier to Swallow? No Pun Intended It seems to me that the principles of honoring hunger and fullness, and coping with your emotions with kindness are likely less controversial. This is consistent with principles of mindful eating and awareness, and in my experience, most people whether or not they have had surgery, are on board with these concepts. Reject the Diet Mentality Quote from Intuitive Eating website: Throw out the diet books and magazine articles that offer you the false hope of losing weight quickly, easily, and permanently. Get angry at diet culture that promotes weight loss and the lies that have led you to feel as if you were a failure every time a new diet stopped working and you gained back all of the weight. If you allow even one small hope to linger that a new and better diet or food plan might be lurking around the corner, it will prevent you from being free to rediscover Intuitive Eating. Although I've said before and I'll say it again I think you can reject th...

Episode 81. "My metabolism is damaged." This is a common concern I hear. And I get it. Chronic weight loss dieting does often have a very negative impact on our bodies and our metabolism. Ignoring hunger, going long periods of time without eating, eating foods because some "expert" told us it was good for us, often leads to stress, inflammation, mistrust of our bodies signals and ultimately mistrust of ourselves. And yet, today's guest is Amy Braden, would generously shares her story and reminds us that our body still loves us, and there still is hope. There is also more than one way to be an intuitive eater and develop self-trust. Amy Braden is a podcast listener who accepted my invitation to share her story. She said something early in the interview that I cannot get enough of. She was talking about how our bodies hold a lot of wisdom, especially when we learn to listen and appreciate them, versus try to control and shape them. And then Amy said: “And when you actually take care of them and nourish them, they will forgive an awful lot, and love you.” - Amy Braden Highlights of the Conversation: A great example of what self-advocacy looks like in medical and mental health settings How hard it is to get appropriate treatment for binge eating disorder What Amy wishes she'd have known about intuitive eating Why Amy is grateful that she waited to get bariatric surgery How discussions about weight and weight loss can coincide with discussions about intuitive eating and self-trust The role of meditation in her journey Ready to Break the Binge Eating Cycle for Good? Ready to stop avoiding and break the binge eating cycle for good? The first step is to disrupt the cycle. My free practical guide has 23 positive ideas for things to do instead of eating. Don't worry, you wont find the standard diet culture BS advice (take a walk, have some water!) Take the first step to finally stop binge eating and grab my free practical guide today! Grab my free guide to disrupt the cycle of emotional and binge eating today! Support Local Bookstores Near You! Did you know that that if nothing slows their momentum, Amazon will have almost 80% of the book market by the end of 2025? Look, I love the convenience of Amazon, but I’ve got a super cool way that you can support local bookstores and my blog and podcast simply by buying books like you already do! You can choose any bookstore on the list in the US (they plan to expand to other counties in the future) OR you can just let the donation get split between all stores. They have raised over 15 million dollars for local bookstores. On my bookshop, you will see my absolute favorite books related to health and wellness, courage and vulnerability, and even my favorite fiction and kids books! My recent favorite related to achieving a deeper level of healing is No Bad Parts: Healing Trauma and Restoring Wholeness with the Internal Family Systems Model. This book and model of therapy has been very helpful to me personally and I'm also using it with clients and seeing great results. So if you believe in supporting local businesses and want to support my blog and podcast, please consider buying your books through Bookshop from now on! The Psychology of Wellness Bookshop Link. Disclaimer: This blog and podcast is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not a substitute for individual professional advice or treatment, including medical or mental health advice. It does not constitute a provider patient relationship. Disclosure: Using the Bookshop.org links in this post means that I would get an affiliate fee if you purchase from the online bookshop (this supports my business, and local bookstores too!).

Episode 80. What do you think is the reason for your binge eating or emotional eating? And when I say binge eating, what I mean is any eating you are doing where you feel even slightly out of control, guilty about it, feel like you "should" restrict certain foods, have certain food rules (even if they feel like they are "healthy" rules). Any and all of that is a form of disordered eating, and although it's very normalized, it does not need to be your reality. What to Expect in this Episode: My Iceberg Analogy for eating behavior (and why it works for almost any behavior) What types of things keep us stick in the binge eating cycle The most common mistakes that keep us stuck for years longer than we want to be Tangible steps to get yourself unstuck "I am binge eating because..." Most people when they come to work with me, or hear what I do have some sense of what they think might be causing their binge eating. They probably don't know for sure, but they have some guesses. Here are some of them: I just need to have more self control, more willpower (aka I'm weak) I am addicted to sweets or carbs (aka something is wrong with my brain, and therefore me) "No childhood sh*t, I just need some strategies." Have you seen Brene Brown's Ted Talk on the Power of Vulnerability? If not, it's time to become one of the 18 million views it's gotten at the time of this writing and recording. She said something that always makes me laugh: "No childhood sh*t, I just need some strategies." I can soooo relate to this. As a psychologist and a science minded person, I so badly wanted to be able to fix my emotional pain with books, learning, and strategies. All the Strategies in the World Won't Help If You Don't Address the Root Cause But guess what? All the best strategies in the world won't help if you don't get to the root of the issue. And as it turns out, most of our pain comes from childhood sh*t, or other early experiences. Although some of our pain may come from painful interactions as an adult. So while strategies may provide some Band-aid type relief, it's unlikely to solve the root of the issue. Examples of possible Band-aid fixes as it relates to our eating habits: Getting a new eating plan, meal prep strategy, reading a new book (e.g., Paleo, plant-based) Joining a new gym Eating to cover up our emotions or discomfort The Issue with Dieting The thing that is so confusing to so many, and was confusing to me, is that we see the surface behavior only. The "tip of the iceberg" if you will. I've had many people tell me lately that they are trying a new approach for their eating. The most common one lately is intermittent fasting. But the other common one is eating less gluten or carbohydrate heavy foods. But there are subtle things that I hear, that suggest to me their new plan is unlikely to work. Not because the plan is bad necessarily. I know a few people who do a lower gluten diet without any diet mentality at all, and they feel good. But I hear things like: "I really should be eating better, [and I'll work on it soon]" (diet mentality) "I can't lose weight because I continue to eat or drink [enter any food perceived as unhealthy here]" (self-blame and shame) "I just need to return to a more consistent schedule." (suggests to me that the eating plan they chose wont work for them long-term) "I've lost X amount of lbs so far." (indicates that they are focused on weight loss, versus internal motivators) When really, it's the stuff underneath the water's surface that's keeping us stuck. There's Nothing Wrong with You, and You Can Act More Skillfully People often also think that something is wrong with their character. Like something about them is defective. They also usually think that they need to just "control themselves" and "make a plan." Some of them might think there's some pain or traumatic expe...

Episode 79. Struggling with consistency for healthy habits? Over and over you have the intention, but it just isn't happening. It's good for you. You feel excellent after you do it. And yet, you keep failing. Guess what? It's time to change how you are talking to yourself. Today we are going to talk about how language affects our motivation for healthy habits and how one simple shift can make a big difference. "I Really Need to Lose Weight" Most people that come to see me know they need to work on their relationship with food and their body. They often realize that they really have a lot of shame around eating and their body and this needs to change. They might even say "I really want to understand how to love myself." Know what 99% of them say as well? "Aaaand, I know it isn't the main focus, but I really also need to lose weight." (and they they give me a look like, "You understand this right, Shawn? This weight isn't healthy for me. I need you to get that.") I believe part of this is just wanting to feel understood. Like, "you get how uncomfortable I am right? How much I feel a desire to make a major change and feel good right?" And I absolutely do. And the way we often talk to ourselves about our eating habits makes it almost impossible to make sustainable healthy habit changes. Understanding the Impact of Language on Our Motivation for Healthy Habits Right now, you might be thinking: But Shawn, I really do need to lose weight, my body is super unhealthy right now, orI don't understand why saying that is a problem, some people really do need to lose weight for their health.Why is it so bad to say what I want? Others, especially health care professionals who have been taught that weight gain causes health problems, might be outraged. They might think: That's irresponsible Shawn, if we can't have a conversation with someone who needs to lose weight for health reasons, we are not doing our jobs To be clear, there's nothing wrong with: Having a desire for weight loss (most people do for a variety of reasons)Discussing someone's weight as it relates to their health (notice I didn't say cause here) Unpacking The "Need" to Lose Weight Comment To explain why I hate this sentence "I need to lose weight" so much, we need to step back a minute and consider how it impacts you when you say it. I want you to imagine that you have a certain habit change you want to make. Lets say you maybe want to exercise more. Want Versus Need and the Impact of Language You might think to yourself, "gosh I really need to exercise more," I'm really slacking in that area. Let's Do an Experiment Consider the statement for a moment, and just take a moment to tune into your body. "I really need to exercise more." Notice any physical sensations or emotions you feel in your body. For most of us, when we say I "need" to do something, we might feel mildly tense, perhaps a little anxious. It feels like pressure, expectation, and like a "should." We may feel guilt that we haven't yet. Although we may want to do the behavior, that sentence directly impacts how we feel. And makes us less likely to do it. "I really need to exercise more." Now Try it Another Way This time, let's made a slight tweak to, "I really want to exercise more." Now tune in to your body and notice what is there. Maybe take a breath in, and out. Just notice for a few seconds, if your body feels any different than before. You see, that one swap can make a big difference. We feel more calm, relaxed, and more drawn to actually do the behavior we truly want to do. Instead of guilt, we may actually feel excited. For those who have been following me for a long time, this is the difference between external should-based motivation, to internal and sustainable motivation (aka autonomous motivation). "But Shawn, I really do need to lose weight."

"I know what I need to do to [stop binge eating/emotional eating], I'm just not doing it." If I had a dollar for every time a client said that to me, I'd be a very rich woman. I'm here to tell you all the knowledge in the world probably won't be enough. I should know. I got my PhD in Clinical Psychology studying weight management and binge eating. And even after all of that, I couldn't solve my own binge eating and "weight issue". As I was binge eating and gaining weight, I thought all the time: "I know what I need to do, I'm just not doing it." "There must be something wrong with me." Now I know the truth. The truth is that there's something wrong with the system. Are you ready to stop binge eating permanently? If you feel: Out of control or ashamed of your binge eating, emotional eating, or your weight, and Are ready to take action with things that will actually help you stop the cycle This post is for you. Hey there. I'm Shawn Hondorp. I'm a clinical psychologist and I've studied the psychology of eating behavior since 2008. In this post I review the key things that helped me and so many of my clients stop binge eating permanently. F*ck Coping Start Healing I recently learned of a book called F*ck Coping Start Healing. It's about healing from anxiety (I haven't actually read it yet). But I love the title. Don't you? At this point in my life, I'm very tired of quick fix or the surface level strategies. During my 13 years of struggle with binge eating, I spent years trying surface level strategies that left me frustrated and tired. I had many periods of what the medical field would call "remission." During these periods, which lasted weeks or sometimes months, I wouldn't binge at all, or I would do so rarely. Or I would only feel slightly out of control. There was even a period of a little over a year where I felt really at peace with food and myself after I lost weight with Weight Watchers. I thought I was "cured." But it never lasted. Skipping the Band-Aid Solutions We may be able to help someone who is abusing alcohol to stop drinking temporarily by putting them in a rehab center or by removing all alcohol from their home and taking away their keys. But is that going to lead to long-term change? Probably not. We need to understand the root cause of the drinking to prevent it from happening again. It's Normal to Want the Quick Fix The desire for the quick fix makes perfect sense. Of course you want to do things that help you feel good now. Our brains are hard-wired to avoid pain and to seek comfort. When it comes to eating struggles, all of the following offer temporarily relief from pain: Eating a big bowl of Lucky Charms and watching Bridgerton on NetflixSkipping a meal because we are busy at work, and secretly thinking "good, hopefully I will lose some weight" and feeling in controlPlanning a next diet or fitness effort Vulnerability is courage in you, and weakness in me Do you ever read what others write online and think, "Wow that's brave, but I could never do that." If so, I have been where you are. Back in 2009, I was deep in my binge eating disorder shame spiral. No one knew how much I was struggling. And I wanted to keep it that way. I was going to solve this dang problem myself if it was the last thing I did. And then, once I solved it, then maybe I'd share my story. Ready to Break the Binge Eating Cycle for Good? Ready to stop avoiding and break the binge eating cycle for good? The first step is to disrupt the cycle. My free practical guide has 23 positive ideas for things to do instead of eating. Don't worry, you wont find the standard diet culture BS advice (take a walk, have some water!) Take the first step to finally stop binge eating and grab my free practical guide today! Grab my free guide to disrupt the cycle of emotional and binge eating today!

Episode 77. What Does My Body Image Have to Do With My Anxiety? For this special episode I sat down with my friend and colleague Dr. Julia King, a fellow psychologist who specializes in anxiety, body image and disordered eating. We cover a lot in this conversation including: How your anxiety is keeping you stuck in a cycle of disordered eating and poor body image The book that totally changed Dr. King's and my life, and how you can feel more empowered than ever with how you spend your time First steps to jump out of the emotional eating cycle and address what's really bothering you And much more! Ready to Break the Binge Eating Cycle for Good? Ready to stop avoiding and break the binge eating cycle for good? The first step is to disrupt the cycle. My free practical guide has 23 positive ideas for things to do instead of eating. Don't worry, you wont find the standard diet culture BS advice (take a walk, have some water!) Take the first step to finally stop binge eating and grab my free practical guide today! Grab my free guide to disrupt the cycle of emotional and binge eating today! Support Local Bookstores Near You! Did you know that that if nothing slows their momentum, Amazon will have almost 80% of the book market by the end of 2025? Look, I love the convenience of Amazon, but I’ve got a super cool way that you can support local bookstores and my blog and podcast simply by buying books like you already do! You can choose any bookstore on the list in the US (they plan to expand to other counties in the future) OR you can just let the donation get split between all stores. They have raised over 15 million dollars for local bookstores. On my bookshop, you will see my absolute favorite books related to health and wellness, courage and vulnerability, and even my favorite fiction and kids books! My recent favorite related to achieving a deeper level of healing is No Bad Parts: Healing Trauma and Restoring Wholeness with the Internal Family Systems Model. This book and model of therapy has been very helpful to me personally and I'm also using it with clients and seeing great results. So if you believe in supporting local businesses and want to support m blog and podcast, please consider buying your books through Bookshop from now on! The Psychology of Wellness Bookshop Link. Disclaimer: This blog and podcast is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not a substitute for individual professional advice or treatment, including medical or mental health advice. It does not constitute a provider patient relationship. Disclosure: Using the Bookshop.org links in this post means that I would get an affiliate fee if you purchase from the online bookshop (this supports my business, and local bookstores too!).

Episode 76. Have you ever thought... Why can't I stop emotional eating? Happy, sad, anxious, bored... eating is my go to! Why can't I just cope with my emotions without food like "normal people"! Or,Why can't I have a little more self-control and break out of the cycle? Well today we are going to answer all of those questions, but also I will address questions you may not know to ask, such as... What does emotional eating have to do with fear of death?How does diet culture influence my beliefs about my health and how does that influence my eating habits and keep the emotional eating cycle (aka the diet-binge cycle) going? What can I do to make sure I'm actually using my time on earth well and not wasting it on ineffective dieting, covering my emotions with food, and/or being too afraid to pursue what I really want? Ready to Break the Emotional Eating Cycle? Ready to stop avoiding and break the emotional eating cycle for good? The first step is to disrupt the cycle. If you want some practical ideas for things today besides the standard diet culture BS advice (take a walk, have some water!) then grab my free practical guide today! Anxiety, Fear of Death, & Diet Culture I'll tell you a story about a client named Trish (not a real name or client, but similar to many clients I've worked with over the years). Trish came to me in distress. She was binge eating most days and had gained around 40 lbs over the past year. Prior to that, she had been on every diet under the sun. Her Weight Watcher group leaders knew her by name. She was referred to me by her doctor who told her that since her father died of a heart attack at age 45, she is at risk. Trish was 34 when she came to see me, and she was scared. She felt scared of having a heart attack, but also really upset and embarrassed to have people see that she gained weight. She worked as a teacher and often tried to dress in dark colors and clothes that would hide her weight gain and she felt uncomfortable in her body every day. Let's Talk Anxiety, Health, and Body Image For next week's episode, I sat down with my friend and colleague Dr. Julia King, a fellow psychologist who specializes in anxiety, body image and disordered eating. We cover a lot in this conversation including: How your anxiety is keeping you stuck in a cycle of body image concerns and disordered eatingThe book that totally changed Dr. King and my life, and how you can feel more empowered than ever with how your spend your timeFirst steps to jump out of the emotional eating cycle and address what's really bothering youAnd much more! This week, I'm going to break down some of the concepts we will discuss next week in greater detail so you will be fully ready to absorb the messages and run with it to create a more empowered relationship to food and your body. What is Anxiety? Anxiety is a feeling of fear, dread, uneasiness and is created by a perception of threat." - Dr. Julia King, Psychologist and Anxiety Expert There is a cycle that exists between our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. For example, we often have: Thoughts and Beliefs about ourselves (e.g., "I'm not good enough at this weight" for example), that impact ourEmotions (e.g., fear, anxiety related to health-related fears and/or fears related to not being accepted socially), and these affect ourBehavior (e.g., avoiding social gatherings, not posting pictures of ourselves or hiding in pictures, emotional eating or going on a restrictive diet) Thought - Feeling- Behavior Cycle for anxiety using a weight-related example Anxiety and Fear Keep Us Stuck Anxiety and fears back in the day when we were running from lions was helpful. You see a lion, run away from it, and hopefully escape to safety. The fear goes away. You are safe. Life is good. Now, anxiety and fears often keep us stuck, immobilized. Not taking action towards a life we deeply desire and instead taking action...

Episode 75. Hello my dear listeners and readers. I'm typically honest on this podcast and blog, but this time I'm going to break it down and be super honest. Despite being VERY intentional and trying everything I could try to not buy into hustle culture in my business, I fell into the trap. At times, I have pushed myself and my team too hard and ultimately this led to less quality work and some degree of failure. I've thought a lot about this over the past few months. Including, but not limited to: How diet culture and hustle culture overlap, How failure truly can be a good thing,How you can learn from my experiences and regrets What To Expect in This Episode: I will cover: Some of the personal lessons I've learned about "Hustle Culture" in the past few monthsHow Hustle Culture and Diet Culture are related and how they impact our motivationMy early reflections on the reality of being a woman in our culture and how this impacts our relationship to food and ourselvesAbout how my mind and body are telling me I must slow down, and how I'm learning to truly listen (even when in many ways it would be easier to keep hustling)What you can expect from me and the Motivation Made Easy podcast and blog moving forward (what the heck I mean by intuitive podcasting, lol)Some teasers for the upcoming topics on the podcastHow you can stay in touch with me! Hustle Culture & Me Even when we try SO DARN HARD, sometimes we can't escape it. Despite doing a business training for 12 months all about "working smarter, not harder" and truly giving it my all, I didn't quite create what I'd wanted to create. I wanted to create a team who was invigorated and enthusiastic about the work. Who was intrinsically motivated, where it didn't really feel like "work." I certainly accomplished some of our objectives, but something was off. As the owner and CEO, I must look at myself first. "You Have to Be Consistent." For 75 episodes, I've come out with a podcast and corresponding blog post every single week. I heard over and over from online marketers, "consistency is key"! I also heard that "If you stop creating consistent content, you will lose your listeners. I also heard messages like, “Most people give up just when they’re about to achieve success. They quit on the one yard line. They give up at the last minute of the game one foot from a winning touchdown.” I feared (and still fear a bit) that if I slow down, I'll lose momentum somehow. I'll lose you my dear listeners. You will be swept away by some other podcast that does come out with weekly episodes NO MATTER WHAT and I'll be lost to you in the abyss of the internet. "I Don't Want to Lose What I've Gained" - "Shoulds" and Online Marketing Have you ever heard of the idea of "sunk cost"? It's definition is: The phenomenon whereby a person is reluctant to abandon a strategy or course of action because they have invested heavily in it, even when it is clear that abandonment would be more beneficial. It makes sense in many ways that once we've worked really hard at something, we don't want to let it go. Abandon the effort. This can apply to relationships ("But I've invested SO much time in this already, we have so much history I don't want to start over."), education ("But I'm already 1/2 way through my degree program, I should just finish"), or work ("I've been in this career for so long, I can't start over"). When Pressure for Consistency Becomes Counterproductive The question we really need to ask is, when are we "being consistent" and aligned with our values, and when are we creating more harm than good by following our routines? When are we being fickle and flimsy on what matters to us, and when are we staying true to the best way to be for ourselves? The reality is, as I often say, only the person in the body knows. Only I could (can) decide if weekly episodes were still doable. I was SO hesitant to let them go.