Barb Knows Best

This week, Barb and Michelle dive into the much-requested topic of aging, what they think about the term “anti-aging”, and how they’ve managed their own feelings about the aging process. Follow us @MichelleMaros and @Peaceful_Barb and share your experiences with us @BarbKnowsBestPod or atwww.michellemaros.com/podcast.

Episode Notes:

• We all are constantly aging, it means we are alive.

• Set an intention daily to be comfortable in your own skin.
• You are more than just your looks and your age.
• You are a combination of all things.
• Beauty is not just on the outside, it is also on the inside.

• Love and accept yourself in this moment by embracing who you are and what you are now.

Three questions to ask yourself when trying to cultivate positive self-talk:

1. What am I thinking moment to moment? Respond with a positive affirmation when a negative thought comes into the mind.
2. What am I saying to myself? Name the negative for what it is: a lie.
3. What is happening in this moment? Pause so that you can have awareness of your feelings.

There are two constants in life:

1. Change is inevitable.
2. You are always worthy.

References Mentioned in Today’s Podcast:

How to Real Love and (Completely) Accept Yourself by Michelle Maros

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In this week’s episode, Barb and Michelle discuss the art of assertive communication, and how we all can cultivate the skills needed to communicate in this way. Plus, they share their own personal experiences being afraid to be assertive for fears of not being liked, and more! Follow us @MichelleMaros and @Peaceful_Barb and share your experiences with us @BarbKnowsBestPod or atwww.michellemaros.com/podcast.

Episode Notes:

Tips to becoming a more assertive communicator:

• Know who you are and what you want.
• Say what you mean.
• Be present in your conversation.
• Take responsibility and do not be passive in your communication.
• Ask questions for clarity.
• Tell the truth.
• Know when to be silent.
• Give yourself permission to take space in the conversation.
• Reinforce your boundaries.
• Be open to compliments as well as criticism.

Helpful responses when you are in a difficult conversation:

1. I’ve already said No twice. Could we please talk about something else?
2. I don’t tolerate (insert boundary here), so we can pause this conversation and come back to it later.
3. Please let me finish this one thought and I will give you a chance to speak.
4. I am not comfortable doing that or that doesn’t work for me. This one line will help with someone who is not willing to take “no” for an answer.

References Mentioned in Today’s Podcast:

10 Reminders for Effective Communication by Michelle Maros

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This week, Barb and Michelle open up about personal situations they both have been going through that made them feel overwhelmed and weakened, and how they bounced back to regain their power. Follow us @MichelleMaros and @Peaceful_Barb and share your experiences with us @BarbKnowsBestPod or at  www.michellemaros.com/podcast.

Episode Notes:

• Fear can show itself as uncertainty.
• It’s okay to be uncertain but honor you’re the work you are doing.
• It’s so important to understand your feelings and how fear is showing up in your life.
• There is a difference between needing to take a pause and reflect and and being stagnant, where there is no decision to be made at this moment.
• Life is filled with subtle shifts that can help you feel more powerful.
• The power to do all things, including those that are hard, is within you.
• Sometimes doing the hard thing is the right thing, and could make you feel better.

Helpful tips to get through the uncertainty:

• Make a list of things that you feel are taking up space and keeping you from moving forward.
• Take action even if it’s the smallest of actions to take that step forward out of the chaos.
• Be patient with yourself and give yourself grace.  
• Don’t carry the negative thoughts that say “you can’t” with you.

References Mentioned in Today’s Podcast:

• Opening Up by Michelle Maros
• Barb and Michelle’s Reel

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This week, Barb talks about a recent experience where she had an “off” day, how she got through it, and what we all can remember when we feel like life is against us. Follow us @MichelleMaros and @Peaceful_Barb and share your experiences with us @BarbKnowsBestPod or at  www.michellemaros.com/podcast.

Episode Notes:

Tips to help you get through tough days:

• Recognize your feelings.
• Lean on your support system.
• Give yourself space.
• Look for the tiny joys.
• Be open to a different solution.
• Allow yourself recovery time.

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From a listener request, Barb and Michelle discuss releasing personal judgments we hold for our own mistakes and missteps. In this episode, Barb and Michelle talk about their own personal experiences with making mistakes, how they forgave themselves, and the reminders they rely on to remember that our past doesn’t ever define who we are. Lastly, they discuss the silver lining to our mistakes and how to find strength to move through it.Follow us @MichelleMaros and @Peaceful_Barb and share your experiences with us @BarbKnowsBestPod or at www.michellemaros.com/podcast.

Episode Notes:

• Mistakes encourage us to look for another direction or a source of action. They can keep us moving forward if we allow them too.
• Perfectionism and failing to own that we are human stunts are growth.



Tips to letting go and learning from mistakes:

• Forgive and love yourself.
• Remind yourself that everything happens for a reason and see what you can learn from this situation.
• Reframe the situation.
• All yourself to feel the feelings but do not live in the negative feelings.
• Stay present and know that this too shall pass.

 

References Mentioned in Today’s Podcast:

• Finding the Lesson in Mistakes by Michelle Maros
• How We Can Learn from Our Mistakes by Michelle Maros
• What I’ve Learned About Making Mistakes by Michelle Maros

 

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As much as we all try to be kind and compassion, sometimes, people are mean to us. It’s a fact of life that once we learn to accept it, we can cultivate tools to manage it. This week, Barb and Michelle talk about how they handle “mean people”, and simple reminders for when you feel overwhelmed by someone else’s behavior. Follow us @MichelleMaros and @Peaceful_Barb and share your experiences with us @BarbKnowsBestPod or at www.michellemaros.com/podcast. 

Episode Notes:

Things to consider when people are mean to you:

1. We can’t control how other people behave.
2. We can’t change other people.
3. Don’t take what other people do personally. It has nothing to do with you.

Reasons for understanding why someone is acting in a hurtful way:

1. Hurt people, hurt people. 
2. Envy as the root of their behavior. 
3. Emotional reactivity. 
4. Projection.
5. Lack of awareness.
6. Too focused on their own needs to think of yours.

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As much as we all try to be kind and compassion, sometimes, people are mean to us. It’s a fact of life that once we learn to accept it, we can cultivate tools to manage it. This week, Barb and Michelle talk about how they handle “mean people”, and simple reminders for when you feel overwhelmed by someone else’s behavior. Follow us @MichelleMaros and @Peaceful_Barb and share your experiences with us @BarbKnowsBestPod or at www.michellemaros.com/podcast. 

Episode Notes:

Things to consider when people are mean to you:

1. We can’t control how other people behave.
2. We can’t change other people.
3. Don’t take what other people do personally. It has nothing to do with you.

Reasons for understanding why someone is acting in a hurtful way:

1. Hurt people, hurt people. 
2. Envy as the root of their behavior. 
3. Emotional reactivity. 
4. Projection.
5. Lack of awareness.
6. Too focused on their own needs to think of yours.

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In this week’s episode, Barb and Michelle discuss how they have learned to let go of the small stuff, and focus on the things that matter. It’s easy to take the words and actions of other people personally, but luckily, with practice we can learn to let it go. Follow us @MichelleMaros and @Peaceful_Barb and share your experiences with us @BarbKnowsBestPod or at  www.michellemaros.com/podcast.

Episode Notes:

Helpful Tips to Becoming Unbothered:

1. Recognize that not everything needs an emotional reaction.
2. Don’t make assumptions.
3. Avoid personalizing what other people do.
4. Know your limits.

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In this week’s episode, Barb and Michelle dive into tricky situations in life that they are no longer taking ownership of. It’s easy to fall into the habit of feeling responsible for the things that happen around us, especially if we are people-pleasers. Luckily, with awareness, we can start to release this habit, and focus on what we can control and take ownership of. Follow us @MichelleMaros and @Peaceful_Barb and share your experiences with us @BarbKnowsBestPod or at www.michellemaros.com/podcast.

Episode Notes:

10 things that we need to release responsibility for:

1. Managing other people’s moods. 
2. It’s not your job to meet society’s expectations of who you “should be”.
3. You are not responsible for fulfilling your parents’ dreams. 
4. It is not your job to assume responsibility for what people do to themselves. 
5. It’s not your job to be the peacekeeper for your entire family. 
6. It’s not your job to control how other people choose to behave. 
7. It’s not your job to sacrifice your own basic needs to serve others. 
8. It is not your job to keep everyone around you happy. 
9. It is not your responsibility or your job to change or try to fix other people.
10. It is not your responsibility to yes every time someone wants something from you.  

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In this episode, Barb and Michelle dive into the vulnerable topic of body positivity, and how ultimately we can cultivate a feeling of love and acceptance for the bodies we live in. Follow us @MichelleMaros and @Peaceful_Barb and share your experiences with us @BarbKnowsBestPod or at  www.michellemaros.com/podcast.

Episode Notes:

Body affirmations to help overcome those negative thoughts regarding our body image:

• I love/accept/care myself just as I am.
• I am worthy of love and care just as I am.
• I am more than enough.
• I deserve love, respect and kindness.
• My body is a precious gift.
• I love and trust the wisdom of my body.
• I choose to take excellent care of myself.
• Taking care of myself feels good.

 

References Mentioned in Today’s Podcast:

• 2 Experiences that Damaged My Body Image (and How I Bounced Back) by Michelle Maros
• The Past, Present, and Future of Body Image In America by Anna North
• Maintenance Phase Podcast

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